I am nuts

2008-02-11T23:50:00.000+08:00

I was reading in interest on this article at CNA website.

Basically, consumers are starting to ask why the bank isn't cutting their interest rates now that the SIBOR or interbank lending rates are coming down, and that the banks should start to pass on the savings to the customers. I have a simple answer to that. GREED.

Lets be honest with ourselves. Banks are corporate entities. They exists to make money. They are not some charitable organisation or govt entities whose purposes are to serve the public good *sniggers* ~~NKF, LTA, PTA, PAP anyone?~~ An opportunity to make more money while cutting your own costs makes good business sense, which would allow the ~~top management~~ shareholders of the companies make more profit and bonuses.

I'm quite sure even when eventually the bank comes out with more competitive packages/interest rates, they will find a way of offering it only to NEW customers and not for existing customers that would want to do a refinancing to this better rate so that they can continue to milk the poor souls who signed on the dotted line believing that a variable interest rate will actually come down. Never seen that happening before. *shrugs*

Analysts say banks yet to respond to call for mortgage rate cuts
By Pamela Almeda, Channel NewsAsia | Posted: 11 February 2008 2253 hrs
Photos 1 of 1

SINGAPORE : With global interest rates trending downwards, some Singapore homeowners are hoping to see a similar move in mortgage rates.

This is especially after the Singapore Interbank Offered Rate (SIBOR) hit its lowest level in almost four years in late December - at 1.5 percent.

However, some analysts have said that the banks may not be willing to lower rates, in light of the current volatility in global financial markets.

Global interest rates are trending downwards, with the US Federal Reserve cutting its benchmark by one and a quarter point over two weeks recently.

The SIBOR has also been slipping - hitting its lowest since 2004 in recent months.

SIBOR is the rate at which banks lend to each other and it usually affects mortgage rates.

Some market watchers have said that they expect to see further downside.

Jimmy Koh, Vice-President, Global Markets and Investment Management, UOB Group, said, "We'd probably see Sing rates by the middle of the year maybe about 1.25 percent and probably hovering around this level as we hit towards the end of the year."

Currently, the SIBOR is at 1.67 percent, down from 3.44 percent a year ago.

Some homeowners are hoping that this could translate into lower mortgage rates.

However some analysts said they do not expect to see any adjustment soon, given the current global credit crunch.

Thio Chin Loo, Senior Currency Strategist, BNP Paribas, said, "In this downturn, because of the uncertainty of the scenario, banks would be quite unwilling to cut rates too quickly even if SIBOR rates were falling. So I think there is going to be a lag still, but what they will promote is probably these flexible packages that are pegged off SIBOR yields".

The pressure, though, will be on the banks to move.

Professor Annie Koh, Associate Dean, Singapore Management University, said, "If enough customers are (saying)...'we can see the transparency of the SIBOR, why isn't housing loan rates coming down', the banks have to come in and say 'okay maybe we were pegging it to last year's interbank rate. The revision should be coming in now'.

"So new loan rates will probably be a lot more competitive because it's so clearly shown to the rest of the world what the SIBOR rates are at right now."

Experts also said SIBOR-pegged packages are attractive, especially if there is an option to convert to fixed rates.

Professor Koh said, "You should ask the bank, is there an option where I can take the first 3 years on a floating loan basis...and I like the option to convert from floating to fixed."

Loans pegged to SIBOR can be beneficial in the short term as the SIBOR is expected to decline further to about 1.25 percent by mid-year, remaining steady until the year-end.

However, analysts have said that inflation is a risk to consider.

BNP Paribas' Thio said, "I don't dismiss that higher inflation could actually push rates up further down the line and that those who are on these flexi-package could be exposed."

Meanwhile, the Big Three banks told Channel NewsAsia that in fixing mortgage rates, there are other factors to consider, apart from SIBOR.

These include long-term market trends, operating costs as well as pricing competition.

The average mortgage rate in Singapore stands at between 3.75 percent and 4.5 percent.

Koh Kar Siong, Managing Director and Head of Secured Loans, DBS, said, "Our mortgage packages are pegged to publicly benchmarked rates such as Sibor and CPF Ordinary Account rate, and they will move in tandem with market rate movement.

"Customers no longer have to worry about paying higher interest rates as the mortgage rates will always be aligned to the market."

A UOB spokesperson said, "We are monitoring the situation and note that pricing of mortgages are long-term financial commitments, and we strive to provide stable mortgage rates to our customers.

"We would like to highlight that other than cost of funds, operating costs and credit spreads would also have to be considered."

Gregory Chan, Head of Secured Lending, OCBC, said, "Lending rates for the fixed and variable rate home loan packages are determined based on a number of factors which include longer term market rate trends, pricing competition as well as specific details of the loan package, for example the type of property, property development status among others.

"We will review the situation before making any decisions on adjusting the rates of our packages."

Meanwhile, some analysts said the rates are already low, but they do not discount that banks can cut rates.

Robert Prior-Wandesforde, Senior Asian Economist, HSBC, said, "Those fixed rate mortgages are actually at fairly low levels already. They didn't rise a huge amount previously when market interest rates were increasing, and correspondingly they haven't obviously fallen much this time.

"Looking ahead, I would expect with the kind of deposit growth that the banks are seeing, I wouldn't be surprised to see mortgage rates perhaps edge down a little bit in the next few months." - CNA/ms

Back!

2008-02-11T23:36:00.000+08:00

Stopped blogging ever since I started work in this life sucking, energy sapping, money squeezing organisation. Time really flies and it's been more than a year. Was just talking last nite and the topics kinda veered towards blogging and she started asking if I had a blog, which kinda reminded me of this long nelgected place where I had a good time.

And as Mr Wong would say, its a matter of time management. So as of today, I'm back, and hopefully for good :)

Singapore falls even further in press freedom

2006-10-25T22:46:00.000+08:00

In its third year, Singapore has slipped from 140th position to 146th position this year in ranking by Reporters Without Borders.

Area : 620 sq.km.
Population : 4,330,000.
Languages : English, Chinese, Malay, Tamil.
Head of state : President S.R. Nathan.
Head of government : Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong.

Singapore - Annual report 2006

More than a year after coming to power, Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong, son of the country’s strong man, Lee Kuan Yew, had not begun any liberalisation of the media. Despite statements in support of an “open” society, the ruling party still does not brook any criticism.

Questioned by the international press about Singapore’s position in the 2005 World Press Freedom Index (140th out of 167), senior minister Goh Chok Tong called it a “subjective measure computed through the prism of western liberals”. He also defended the Singapore model for controlling the media, saying that a press that was too free was “not necessarily good for the entire country”.

Relatively independent for regional and international news, when it comes to domestic politics Singapore’s press, still controlled by associates of Lee Kuan Yew, is in the grip of a rigorous self-censorship. The government threatens journalists, foreign media and opposition with defamation suits seeking dizzying amounts in damages.

The government uses around a score of draconian laws, particularly those on the granting of licences for publications, on films, religious and political website managers and on national security, to stifle any criticism.

Freelance film-maker Martyn See was accused of breaking the law on films by putting out a “partisan” documentary, “Singapore Rebel”, a portrait of an opposition figure Chee Soon Juan. In August police seized all copies of the film and the videotapes on which it was recorded. The film puts See at risk of a penalty of up to two years in prison or a fine of almost 500,000 euros.

In 2005, Hong Kong-based financial website FinanceAsia.com, apologised and agreed to pay compensation after the authorities threatened a lawsuit against it over an article it posted on a Singaporean investment company with links to the government.

Mdm Ho Ching must step down as head of Temasek

2006-10-22T18:53:00.000+08:00

I'm sure many people's impression of CSJ is not very good, due to the media portray of him as either a raving mad man, or a troublemaker that is a danger to singapore. I once had that impression too. But then I started reading a couple of his books, simply out of curiosity initally, but found that he actually made alot of sense. Sure, some of his antics or articles may be abit over the top for local tastes, but I think we should delve more in depth to simply see the gist of what he was trying to say. For example, the following article makes complete sense to me if you ask me. When will Singaporeans get the transparency out of Temasek that we deserve? Is it another NKF in the making? But this time, with no govt backed entity such as the SPH going against it, who can make them disclose anything? Until now, Temasek has remained dumb on the question as to whether they had knowingly bought full control into Shin Corp despite the Thai laws not allowing them to. They are simply not bothered to even reply to their shareholders(ie Singaporeans) queries.

Media Release: Mdm Ho Ching must step down as head of Temasek
20 Oct 06

Given the revelations of the scandalous deal between Temasek Holdings and Shin Corp which continue to trickle from Bangkok, it is impossible for Singaporeans not to take notice.

The transaction has not only provoked outrage among the Thai people, leading to the souring of relations between Singapore and Thailand.

This reinforces the Singapore Democrats' stand that the Government has to get out of being directly involved in business as it arouses, not without reason, suspicion in the countries in which it makes deals.

In addition, with the questionable performance of the Temasek-linked companies and some high profile debacles, including

- The sinking of Micropolis which cost Singaporeans $630 million

- The ill-advised acquisition of Optus by SingTel which stands to face a write-down of between $5 billion to $8 billion,

- And the present eruption of the Shin Corp deal in which due diligence was not exercised which may yet incur a loss of up to $3 billion

it is clear that Madam Ho Ching, wife of PM Lee Hsien Loong, has failed as head of Temasek. Her decision to buy into Shin Corp has even provoked a criminal investigation into the deal in Thailand.

And while Mr Thaksin Shinawatra and his family are laughing all the way to the bank, Temasek has lost the hard-earned money of Singaporeans which now looks unrecoverable.

While all these developments have taken place, the Government and the company continue to remain tight-lipped apart from the few platitudes offered by the Prime Minister that serve no purpose or have any meaning.

In light of all this the SDP calls on Madam Ho Ching to resign as chief executive of Temasek Holdings.

In addition, in the interest of transparency and accountability Singapore should hold its own public inquiry into the affair and have Temasek come clean about all the related matters. There are reports that the non-transparent deal was influenced by members of the Lee family.

If Temasek is indeed a commercial entity that adheres to the corporate code of conduct, then it will make itself transparent to its shareholders, that is, Singaporeans.

Singaporeans must be given all the information to determine for themselves if there were any wrong-doings by all the players involved.

Chee Soon Juan
Secretary-General
Singapore Democratic Party

On traffic wardens again

2006-10-13T23:44:00.000+08:00

Looks like I'm not the only one with issues with the traffic wardens. Some other folks have started writing in to the ST Forum and I would be looking forward to an explanation they give and see if the answers did indeed come out from a standard template. :)

I would like to see a fairer system rather than the current one where its our words against an public servants, and 9 out of 10 times, our voices are drowned out and simply ignored. I understand that there are some trials being conducted to use the car IU for parking etc, but that would still be a pretty long way to go before it can be used. And lets hope that no EZ-link kinda ~~cock ups~~issues occurs.

For now, I think the cheapest and easiest way to overcome the problem would be to equip the wardens with digital cameras, take pics of the offending car and its coupons as proof. One problem though, they might have some difficultly holding their umbrellas.

Numerology

2006-10-12T00:10:00.000+08:00

I always hated numbers and I never believed much in horoscopes etc, but this have got to be one of the closest that I would ever come to acknowledging one. You should probably try it out for yourself. I just tried the life path and it seems freakingly close. More on it here

Just for the record, I'm Path 8 and SHE is Path 5, and this is what I got.

5 and 8: This is a relationship between two individuals who don't always follow the rules, and they might find themselves locking horns on the rules of a relationship. The 8 is used to being the boss and dominating most situations. The 5 seeks freedom from any restraints. The 8 is focused on success, particularly in a financial sense, and the 5 doesn't even want to think about money. It will take careful planning and compromise to make this relationship work.

Freakishly accurate down to the very last word.

Would want to try out more of the stuff on the site, but I freaking hate numbers and there's like no automated calculator program or something and everything had to be done by hand, and I seriously had enough of calculations for the week. Someone go write a program/script for automated calculations please... haha..

Streaming in school to be scrapped

2006-09-28T20:45:00.000+08:00

Pretty good news if you ask me. I was never a fan of the streaming system, being a pretty late developer myself. As I forced myself to go through hours and hours of additional classes and homework just to keep up, school started losing its lustre and learning changed from being fun, to a chore. Hopefully, future batches will have a better time, and there will be no more stigma attached to kids from the EM3.

Full article here

On traffic wardens

2006-09-28T13:43:00.000+08:00

There has been a recent spate of letters to the ST forums regarding the outsourcing of the responsibility of dishing out traffic offences to the public to private companies. People have complained of getting more summons, the writer that started it all claims to have kena 5 tickets in one month, despite having a clean record for over 40 years. Interesting... haha..

I'm not too sure of the situation nowadays, since I've not driving anymore. I do remember that I was always often booked for certain offences, mainly parking related. I did appeal a couple of them, which I felt was unjustified, for example, there was once I was booked for not displaying my parking coupon CLEARLY even though I left it as I always did just beside the ERP sensor. Appeals were never successful, I almost always got a similar template reply that honestly, is full of bureaucratic crap that if decipered successfully, failed to make any real sense.

I have always wondered a few questions. For example, in my above mentioned case, where the offence is that the coupon is not displayed clearly, how do you define clear? Is there a standardised location where one must display it? What if the warden has poor eyesight? Are there any proofs, for example, the warden should take down a picture of the situation so that if the driver wants to dispute the matter, they can handle it in a clear and just manner, instead of simply one man's word against another's? I did display a valid coupon after all, and I dispute the fact that it was not displayed clearly, but once again, there is no clear definition of 'clear', and it basically ended up between my word against the warden's, neither side having actual proof, yet I ended up on the losing end as I still have to pay up my fine after my failed appeal, otherwise I would have to end up in court.

I recalled an incident some time ago, also in the ST forum, where a member of the public wrote in to comment that he/she witnessed a police officer using his mobile phone without a hands-free set while driving, and listed the time of the offence, as well as the car plate number of the vehicle. The reply from the SPF was that, after investigation, the officer confirmed he was at the place and in the vehicle, but denied that he was using his phone, and the member of public that witness the incident was invited to contact the SPF to pursue the matter. I'm not sure what happened next but I would believe that the writer would most probably choose not to pursue the matter on their own time and the officer will probably get off scott free IF he was guilty as charged. To me, it seems like a public servant's statement is given precedence over the public. Imagine if you receive a summon that you have been spotted taking a car while driving without using a hands-free set at a given time and place, with your car plate number. You admitted being there, in your car, but denied that you have been using your phone. What do you think is the likely outcome?

Foreign talents

2006-09-25T13:09:00.000+08:00

Came across this article on My Singapore News regarding yet another PM dialouge with the youths in their latest ~~charade~~ attempt to connect with the youth.

What interest me is the point being made in the above linked post.

Extract:
During last night's PM dialogue with the youth the concern of letting in too many foreign talents in the salary bracket of $1,800 and $2,500 were raised. This is the group that will hit very hard on our young graduates and executives. The fear is genuine.

Hsien Loong's response was to acknowledge the concern but added, 'I think we should bring in people who can make a contribution and as for our people, you'll compete with them but at the same time because they are here, our economy will grow and there will be more business, more opportunities for us.'

Personally, I fall into this very group. I graduated couple of months back, with a degree in Information Systems & Mangement. Prior to that, I had a diploma from a local polytechnic in an IT related field as well. You can say that IT is both my interest and probably my forte and I consider myself pretty good at it, and enjoy it as well. Like every other young people, I have dreams of landing a 'dream job' whereby I can get a job that pays well, while at the same time doing what you love. Its easier said than done.

I guess in a way, IT industry is more affected than many others say maybe manufacturing or engineering sector as a result of globalisation. IT projects are so many easier to outsource for example, you can easily get a programmer from India or a web designer from China to do parts or even entire projects without having the need to be physically in Singapore at a fraction of the cost compared to hiring locals. I accepted that fact a couple of years back and as software engineering is not my core interest anyway, I have more interest in networks and hardware, it didn't really bother me too much.

The hard fact hit me when I went job hunting. 80% of the interviews I went to, the interviewer basically just sneer at my so called 'accomplishments' such as projects and my results slip and told me that in the real IT industry, paper qualifications count for nothing, they want actual experience. Cool. I can understand that. I'm willing to work for the chance, the experience, as long as you are willing to give me the chance, and of course, a reasonable pay package. Most of my fellow classmates, which incidently, none is in the IT line anymore, have an average pay package of $2000 - $2500, so I was expecting along the lines of $2000, or maybe slightly lesser by a couple of hundreds, if it meant landing a job I craved.

I did not count the number of interviews I went to, but I'm quite sure that I had been to no fewer than 10 interviews, and I really seen the share of ridiculous offers. The most jarring incident was one whereby the interviewer offered me $1200 and refused to add a cent more, telling me that he can easily get a foreigner with a S-Pass to do the job at that price, and they would be far more experienced than me. In fact, I should be grateful that he is offering me this opportunity to learn and I quote "Nobody will want to hire a fresh graduate these days when we can get more experienced people for less, and they don't need to go back for reservist." I do not want to sound arrogant or anything here, but come on lah, I am afterall a degree holder, you are basically paying me less than what I would have expected even as a poly graduate lor. Back when I was running my pub, I paid my perm staff $1500 a month and he doesn't even have a full 'O' levels. I probably should have gotten a foreigner to do the job too huh... Then where will all the locals go and find their jobs? I seriously can understand if they get foreigners to do stuff that locals want to do such as construction etc, or if they are REAL talents, they can be a CEO or some high ranking expatriates that we have come to get used to. But by allowing them to come in at entry level and take away the opportunity from young fresh graduates, it will only be breeding a whole new generation of discontent youths. Stop giving lip service and model answers in response to questions such as the above mentioned and show us that you are really paying attention to what we are saying.

Thai-Singapore axis set to unravel

2006-09-21T19:44:00.000+08:00

John Burton of the Financial Times
21 Sep 06

Singapore could suffer the most among countries in the region from the military coup against Thaksin Shinawatra, the Thai prime minister, who forged close ties with the city-state and sold his telecommunications group to Singapore's state investment company.

It was the $1.9bn sale of a 49 per cent in Shin Corp by Mr Thaksin's family to Temasek Holdings in January that triggered the political crisis that led to the coup after it was revealed the family paid no taxes on profits from the deal.

Mr Thaksin was seen by Singapore as its strongest supporter for closer economic integration of the Association of South-east Nations, which provoked talk of a Singapore-Bangkok axis within the group.

The ousted Thai leader also expressed admiration for Singapore's political system, telling Singapore officials that he wanted to model his Thai Rak Thai party on the long-ruling People's Action party.

Mr Thaksin decided to sell Shin Corp to Temasek to dispel allegations of conflicts of interest between his family's corporate holdings and his government duties as he prepared to stand for a third term as prime minister.

The deal turned out to be the most controversial conducted by Temasek since Ho Ching, the wife of Singapore's prime minister, became the group's chief executive in 2002 and launched an ambitious global acquisition strategy.

Public protests in Thailand over the deal have led to a nearly 40 per cent fall in Shin Corp's share price since then. In April, Lee Hsien Loong, Ms Ho's husband, told parliament that "Temasek invested in Shin Corp because it saw value in the investment" but added it was not government policy "to second guess Temasek's risk assessments".

A former senior Singapore official, however, criticised Temasek's handling of the deal in light of Mr Thaksin's growing unpopularity at the time. "Temasek did financial due diligence, but not political due diligence," he told the Financial Times. Temasek said it had considered all aspects in concluding the deal.

A Temasek-led consortium increased its stake to 96 per cent in Shin Corp under a mandatory offer, but the takeover has been investigated by Thai regulators over whether Temasek used proxy companies to avoid a 49 per cent ceiling on foreign ownership in strategic industries. Temasek said it fully complied with Thai law.

Michael Montesano, a Thai specialist at the National University of Singapore, believed it was unlikely a new government would nullify the Shin Corp deal, but Temasek might have to reduce its stake if it was found in breach of foreign shareholding limits. Temasek said it was premature to comment on the coup's impact.

Most regional governments expressed concerns about the coup and called for a restoration of democracy in Thailand.

Indonesia's defence minister, Juwono Sudarsono, said the Thai coup illustrated one of the pressures facing south-east Asia's civilian democratic governments. "If there's a lesson it is this: politicians and parliamentarians must get their act together and consolidate party building and deliver on performance," he said. "Otherwise people turn to the military for decisiveness and stability."

In the Philippines, Gloria Macapagal Arroyo, the president who declared a brief state of emergency to crush an alleged coup attempt early this year, was keen to quell speculation the Thai coup might encourage the military to attempt a similar takeover.

Additional reporting by Shawn Donnan in Jakarta and Roel Landingin in Manila

Coup in Thailand

2006-09-20T17:28:00.000+08:00

Received a call early this morning from a friend of mine that didn't know I was back in Singapore. Spoken briefly on msn before my trip and somehow she got Cambodia and Thailand mixed up. Think somebody needs to brush up on their geography.. hehe

Thailand situation update

Personally, I would have loved to be there. I mean, what are the chances you will ever see something like that ever happening in your lifetime, considering the fact that we live in Singapore? Probably when a 'freak results' occur and the military have to step in(refer to last post), which I doubt will happen any time in my lifetime.

Maybe people will say that we do not know how blessed we are living in such a peaceful country blah blah blah... I get that. But I would also like to have some excitment and unpredictablity in my life for a change. Would you really want to just go through the same routine life till the end of times?

Is PAP the only choice?

2006-09-16T20:50:00.000+08:00

I came across this article the other day, and it gave me the chills...

Extract:
"Without the elected president and if there is a freak result, within two or three years, the army would have to come in and stop it," Lee said.

Just a couple of question.

Is the elected president an independent individual or a 'puppet' or failsafe device for the ruling party? Does this mean that the president basically has no will of his own and does whatever PAP tells him? Is his job to serve the people, the ruling party (govt) be it PAP or otherwise, or is he simply a PAP man?

What about the army? Is the army there to serve and protect the nation of singapore, or the PAP party? Can the party, if it is not the ruling party anymore, activate the army at will? Does this also imply that if one day, the PAP is no longer the ruling party, we can expect a civil war? Can our conscripted army choose not to fight if they don't believe in what they are fighting for? Can our sons of singapore not choose another party to rule us through a fair and democratic process(not exactly what I would consider a "freak result") without being threaten with war?

I really fear for our future.

IMF

2006-09-15T23:41:00.000+08:00

Everybodys talking about it, every other person is getting arrested for it as well apparently. Usual suspects include of course our dear Mr CSJ, some activist handing out flyers, including Mr Pillai, who started the 400 frowns campaign to counter the Government's 4 million smiles project. Another website that is campaigning a 4 million frowns project is so far spared, probably because the govt realised that it can never hit that target anyway... hahaha..

Apparently, Mr Pillai was arrested not for starting the campaign, but for distributing flyers. Damn.. Didn't know that there is a law against that. They should do something about those ~~litter~~ flyers that somehow seem to mysteriously appear at my doorstep every morning instead.

I hope that doesn't discourage the burger king auntie from distributing her discount coupons... I need those.

Enough is enough

2006-09-14T05:01:00.000+08:00

I think I have had enough. Enough mourning, enough complaining, and enough of feeling sorry for myself. At least on this blog. :) Those things shall go off from here to another location. Though its not very productive, I still have a need to vent my fustration somewhere, just not here.

I started this blog initally to move away from my mundane life and to blog about more interesting stuff, and thats the way its going to be again. Focus.

Lost

2006-09-08T02:21:00.000+08:00

I'm like a ship with no harbour, a vessel with no captain, a man with no aim, seemingly lost at sea... I'm really really breaking down...

Sail away sweet sister
Sail across the sea
Maybe you'll find somebody
That will love you half as much as me
My heart is always with you
No matter what you do
So sail away sweet sister
Cause I'll always be in love with you

Mess

2006-08-31T19:10:00.000+08:00

In typical fashion, just when I want to leave for a undefined period and not do or think about anything here in Singapore, things came flying in left right and center.

1. RT deferment is rejected. ie I either come back on time for phase 2 or I get charged and/or repeat the whole cycle from phase 1 again.

2. Job offer on the line, requesting that I start work within the next week.

3. Exam results suddenly due to be out tonight. Not sure how it will affect my trip, its either a high or low.

4. It starts raining non-stop both here and aboard. I checked the weather forecast for my destination and the next 5 days are predicted to be rain with thunder and lightning....

What else can go wrong? Well, I could probably fail my exams, miss my flight, can't get a flight back, repeat my RT cycle, get charged by unit, or perhaps simply get mugged there or killed in a terrorist attack. Whatever. Just bring it on. Lets see how much more misery you can dish out. Fuck.

Its time

2006-08-30T22:40:00.000+08:00

I have been re-visiting alot of places that we've been to before. Every place evokes a different memory. This is bad. I keep harping on the past, how can I ever move on? Yet I can't help having this nagging feeling that there is no closure, you just simply choose to disappear and walk out of me, without giving me a reason at all. I can't move on if I cannot get closure from the issue, but I really doubt I can ever get it from someone that refuses to face the problem.

To make things easier for us both, maybe I shall disappear too. I'll be leaving singapore within the next 48 hrs. You can stop hiding and relax. Take some time off. Talk to your friends. Do your shopping. Think about stuff. If you still have anything to say to me, I'm willing to listen. But if you think that you still cannot face me, or have nothing to say, I shall not force you any further.

Have a nice life.

Facing the truth

2006-08-29T03:56:00.000+08:00

I went to our, or rather, her favourite spot today. I don't know why I did it, I just seem to drive myself there without really thinking. And I just sat there, for hours and hours, thinking, waiting, hoping.

Thinking of all the times we spent together, remembering all those wonderful memories.

Waiting, as if I half expected her to show up.

Hoping against all odds that she does show up, and at least we can have a proper talk face to face. To let me have a chance to salvage this relationship that I hold so dear.

Guess I was being naive again. She has already made it pretty clear. There is nothing to think about anymore for her part, so why would she be here.....??

That was the place where we started, I thought it would be a fitting ending place. I was thinking to myself, if fate was to allow me this one last throw of the dice, it would probably meant I would still have a fighting chance. Perhaps, this is fate's way of telling me no. Maybe I should really just let it go.

Face the fact.

28 Aug 06

2006-08-28T16:56:00.000+08:00

I don't know how to handle this. Or how I will get up from this. How I am going to move on. I'm seriously hurt big time.

My heart had never hurt as much as it did now. I wished this is all a bad dream that I can wake up of. In fact, my entire life had been much of a bad dream that I wanna wake up from. But this is no dream. My life really sux.

I don't know where I should go from here. Should I accept it and try to move on amidst the pain? Or should I still believe that things can still be salvaged?

I can't really bring myself to do anything at the moment. Really stuck in limbo. Can't motivate myself to go apply for jobs, attend interviews or do anything.. Can't bring myself to put on a fake smile and talk about my future when I don't even know where I stand right now.

I think maybe I should leave this place.

How??

2006-08-28T01:00:00.000+08:00

Can't sleep, can't eat, can't stop thinking.

What should I do????

Why can't I just let it go???

Why can't I just ignore it???

Why can't I be just like you???

Why am I feeling the way I feel???

F U C K

It sucks to be me.

Feeling terrible

2006-08-27T18:47:00.000+08:00

I'm feeling damn terrible, in more ways than one. Besides an aching heart, for some reasons, those sickening looking rashes that tormented me so much a few mths ago seem to be making a comeback on my palms.. hope its just my imagination as I have been rather paranoid about seeing any rashes on me since that incident.

My eyes are also swollen I think probably due to contact lens wear. Bloody hell, I only wear them for less a once a mth and for less than a couple of hours during the interview and now both are swollen and I'm experiencing double vision in my left eye. Hope it will go away with more sleep, but with my kinda luck, think I better go see a doctor if it doesn't clear up by tomorrow, which means more $$$ wasted. Sigh. When will things be better again?

Been doing a lot of thinking. Have I really done everything that I can for this relation? Did I see this coming yet choose to ignore the signs? What could I have done? I seriously do not have an answer.

Some people are just born the way they are. I am never born to be the life of the party, with fun and novel ideas for a date every single week. But did I try to be creative, be more spontaneous, be more pro-active? I'll say hell yeah. Could I have tried even harder?? Perhaps. Possibly. Highly likely. But do you really expect me to keep trying and trying when you don't even wanna go along and try out some of the things I suggested, instead choosing to carry them out with your friends instead? Should I have stopped you from going out with your frens and doing activities that we should have been doing together instead of wanting to give each other space to have our own friends? I can't really help it that I'm not as fun as some other people, is being a couple all about having fun? Can we only share good times and not the bad?

I keep thinking to where we had gone wrong. Does the fire just die off like that, without any emblems that can be rekindled with a gentle stir? Or has the fire actually burnt out cold long ago, before I even actually started to notice? Did someone just came along and pour water over the fire? What other external factors are there? What are the internal triggers? I have no answers, I get no answers. Yet I'm someone that need an know something for sure, else I can never just stop thinking about it. Its haunting even my dreams.

真的是死不瞑目

Aimless

2006-08-26T22:57:00.000+08:00

Can't seem to focus my mind. Just don't really feel like doing anything. Its so sickening. There are still so many things I need to do, eapecially since I am still so desperately jobless and saturday has actually the most job listings. Yet I really can't. Fuck.

I wonder what she is doing... :(

It never rains but it pours

2006-08-26T12:30:00.000+08:00

Just when you thought things could not possibly go any worse, it does.

I don't understand how so much can go wrong, so many bad things can befall a single person. Am I like a fucking asshole in my previous life that I have to go through so much shit, time and again. I have to grow up faster and tougher than most kids from a young age, learn to fend for myself, protect myself, earn money to feed myself etc when all the other kids you see can have their parents and maids cooing all over them, pampering them, fufilling their needs. I am proud of myself getting to where I am today, and I spit in the face of those weaklings. But deep down, I always wanted to be just like them, to be able to live a simple happy life, where you don't have to keep watching your back to see if something will go wrong and even when it does, there's always someone that you can fall back on, someone that will always be there for you regardless of what you do, how low you fell. For close to 2 years... 2 fucking years... I thought I had found that.

Of course, I am just being naive. As I said, and should have known by now, NOTHING good will ever come to me. Another lesson from the school of hard knocks for me. This time, I'm not sure if I can bounce back... I simply don't have the strength anymore... I'm really really tired.. How many times over simply the past couple of years had I have to go through shit just to get to where I ~~want~~ am. And now, at the end of the day, all the effort has gone to naught, I have barely half of what I started off with in my bank account, nothing to show for it, a worthless piece of paper they call a degree that cannot get me any job, and my pillar of strength had just collapsed right over me, crushing any remaining spirit that I might have left in me. I am now totally nothing.

I was stupid. Really. If only I had maintained my mantra in life of always holding back, always never giving your all, cause you never know when 100% of your effort will come back and smack you right in the face. If I had only put in 50% of the effort, it will hurt 50% less, and I would have another 50% to start rebuilding again.

Karma. It always comes back to bite you in the ass. Maybe I deserved it for being the bastard that I was. What else can I expect? Bastards end up with bitches. Who am I to try to defy the odds?

Still, it could have been worse. I had planned to get a special tattoo to commemorate our anniversary. Tattoo is for life, and I thought you would be too. I'm not sure if I could spend the rest of my life looking at the tattoo, and thinking about you, and have my heart broken every single day.

I know I sound bitter. I am. For all the effort that I had put in, for all the things I've done, for opening my heart for one single time in my life. This is what I get.

But I do not regret for one moment, that you were once in my life. I can still remember the blur look you always have when you walked into class and it would bring a smile to my face. I still remember how I blushed when I first talked to you. I still remember our first disastrous date, and how miraculous it is that we can still go on to have a second and third date. I still remember your funny hairstyle that made me unable to speak properly due to choking from laughter. I still remember the very first time I held your hand and kissed you in chinablack. I still remember our long walks together at cosy bay and west coast. I still remember you cooking for me, and waiting up for me to return from work.

When I close my eyes, I see your smile, your antics, and the image of you just resting on me. It'll bring a smile to my face. Or a tear.

This is getting too hard for me.

So tired

2006-08-24T12:58:00.000+08:00

Been a real busy and tired week. Interviews after interviews, but nothing concrete has yet to come out of it, I'm feeling so sick of it all. Feeling so useless as you get rejection after rejection, something that I'm honestly not too used to getting. Growing more and more depressed with each passing day.

Had thought that after selling off the pub, maybe can take my time to look for a job as I would at least have some cash to tide me over for the next couple of months. However, it only seems to accentuate my uselessness as I bummed around all day, doing nothing and seemingly sponging off the family.

Had thought that maybe I can spend more time with my gal, now that I actually had both the time and some more spare cash, but it somehow feels that the feeling ain't mutal... There's so many other things that she needs to do, so many other people she needs to talk to, so many other activities she'll rather do. Its really sad for me when I see how she's enjoying the company of others or enjoy doing other things yet when she's with me or even talking to me, she seems so off and distanced, like there's a wall between us, I keep hearing myself bouncing off that invisible wall.

Why do I keep failing, in more ways than one?

Why do I need to keep 'bouncing back' in life? Can't I just not fall?

I'm tired.

World class bootlicker all the way from UK

2006-08-18T01:21:00.000+08:00

Just came across this ST online forum letter and this guy totally makes me sick.

I seriously do not know what to make of him. Is he simply another bootlicker aka lionel de souza or does his naive thoughts actually reflect the majority of singaporeans? I hope its the former cos I shudder to think what would happen if it was the latter. I don't even know where to begin explaining what is so wrong with his views... Read the letter yourself and see what I mean.

Will write more tommorrow, need to be up in 4 hrs time. :(

Observation from taking public transport

2006-08-16T21:57:00.000+08:00

I've been taking quite a bit of public transport these days after years of driving, and I'm still not used to the whole EZ link system. After all those years of using the farecard, where admittingly, I'm often guilty of selecting the lowest fare regardless of my distance :P Nowadays however, I'm making payback as I often forget to tap my card on the way off so I'm paying the max price even if I'm taking just one single stop. As they always say, karma's a bitch.

One interesting observation I made recently, is that when some people board the bus, or train for that matter, they like to put their ENTIRE bag to the scanner instead of just the card. I don't get it. Is it so difficult to take a card out from the bag to tap on the scanner? In general though, I noticed that ladies tend to do it more than men as women tend to be the one carrying bags most of the time(duh).

Earlier today, I noticed this mother with a kid in tow boarding a bus, and as you know when you go out with kids, you tend to pack alot of stuff so you normally have a bigger bag then normal, and she was carrying a small handbag in her hand as well. As she board the bus, she scanned the small bag at the scanner, and when it failed to register, she tried turning the bag around, vertically, 45 degrees etc, and when all that failed, she tried to scan the big bag she had with her, and when that failed, naturally, she tries to turn the bag around at various degrees again. All this while, the queue behind here is stuck, and as a result, the entire bus is effectively waiting for this lady. After a while, she finally stepped to one side and started rumbling through all her bags, in the end, she discovered that she doesn't have her card with her and proceeds to pay cash. What a waste of time.... If she had (attempt to) taken out the card before boarding, she would have realised that she didn't bring it along, and thus saving everybody some time. Imagine that at every bus stop, there is just one person like that which effectively delays the bus for a couple of unneccessary minutes, the entire journey could easily take up at least an extra half an hour or so.

Does these things happen often?? Maybe its one of the reasons why buses are always late, and this is really something that you can't blame on the bus company. (but it still doesn't justify any potential fare hikes)

Happy Birthday Singapore

2006-08-09T14:16:00.000+08:00

Today, our nation turns 41. The national day had never meant anything for me in the past, other than the fact that it is another public holiday which can be best spent on holiday without wasting a day off the annual leave. Not that the mentality had changed much, but I have slowly began to look past certain reasons that had prevented me from actually celebrating the nation's independence before.

First of all, I'm never a fan of any parade. Parades are always boring, and I especially cringe at those videos of how we have progressed from the 3rd world to the 1st when I see 3rd world citizen behavior daily around me. I wondered at the term 'progress'. Through my entire life, progress meant two things to me. Studying hard and 'progress' through the stages from PSLE to O levels to degree etc, and secondly, to 'progress' in life to earn more and more money. That is how we measure progress and success in singapore. By the number of certifications you own in relation to the size of your bank account.

Slowly, as I matured, I started to realise that I wanted more than that. Like a kid growing up, you crave for more pocket money intially to simply get more stuff, but as you enter your teens, you start to crave for more, such as the loosening of curfew, the right to speak up for what you believe is right. Just like my parents, the nation too slapped me down with beliefs they know better, so they ~~should~~ will decide. Just like many teenagers, I rebelled against my parents, but I am unable to rebel against the nation. My parents have 2 kids, while the nation have 4 million, it doesnt mind losing one as long as it serves as an example for the 3.99 million. I can fight back against parental control, I can reason with them(to a certain extent) and show them that my point of view is correct but I cannot fight back or reason against a huge, well oiled bureacratic machine with a history of twisted interpretation and double standards....

But I have learned.... That Singapore is an island, a nation, a place where I grew up on. The place itself I have no grudges against. The place itself does not equate to its governer. I am born and raised here as one of the EQUAL owners of this land. I will not be forced out, and one day, I shall regain my place in it. I am Singaporean.

Singapore cracks down on foreign media

2006-08-07T18:45:00.000+08:00

From http://blogs.guardian.co.uk/greenslade/2006/08/singapore_cracks_down_on_forei.html

The Far Eastern Economic Review has become the latest foreign publication to be targeted by the Singapore authorities. It has been given until 11 September to comply with an Act which demands that it must have a legal representative in the country and pay a deposit of £67,500. Four other publications - the International Herald Tribune, the Financial Times, Time and Newsweek - have also been ordered to do the same when their licences come up for renewal.

A Singapore government spokesman says its position is that "it is a privilege, and not a right, for foreign newspapers to circulate in Singapore". Reporters Without Borders, the press watchdog, says that the rules are really a form of censorship. Singapore is ranked 140th out of 167 countries in RWB's 2005 worldwide press freedom index. (Via Reporters sans frontières - ASIA)

Seems like the govt is really bent on not letting the people get views from what they want you to hear. Is the Straits Time alone really good enough for Singaporeans? All the talk about globalisation, how Singapore cannot afford to stand still etc are basically lip service, or for justifying their own reasons such as getting more and more foreign ~~rubbish~~ talent at the expense of their own citizen. Sometimes, I seriously think that if I migrate to some other country such as the USA, and then come back to SG again as a FT, just through this process alone, your net worth is going to increase. Anyway, the real reason why FEER is subjected to censorship is due to articles like this
(article reproduced below for personal archival purpose)

Singapore’s ‘Martyr,’ Chee Soon Juan
July/August 2006

By Hugo Restall

Striding into the Chinese restaurant of Singapore’s historic Fullerton Hotel, Chee Soon Juan hardly looks like a dangerous revolutionary. Casually dressed in a blue shirt with a gold pen clipped to the pocket, he could pass as just another mild-mannered, apolitical Singaporean. Smiling, he courteously apologizes for being late—even though it is only two minutes after the appointed time.

Nevertheless, according to prosecutors, this same man is not only a criminal, but a repeat offender. The opposition party leader has just come from a pre-trial conference at the courthouse, where he faces eight counts of speaking in public without a permit. He has already served numerous prison terms for this and other political offenses, including eight days in March for denying the independence of the judiciary. He expects to go to jail again later this year.

Mr. Chee does not seem too perturbed about this, but it drives Singaporean Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong up the wall. Asked about his government’s persecution of the opposition during a trip to New Zealand last month, Mr. Lee launched into a tirade of abuse against Mr. Chee. “He’s a liar, he’s a cheat, he’s deceitful, he’s confrontational, it’s a destructive form of politics designed not to win elections in Singapore but to impress foreign supporters and make himself out to be a martyr,” Mr. Lee ranted. “He’s deliberately going against the rules because he says, ‘I’m like Nelson Mandela and Mahatma Gandhi. I want to be a martyr.’”

Coming at the end of a trip in which the prime minister essentially got a free ride on human rights from his hosts—New Zealand Prime Minister Helen Clark didn’t even raise the issue—this outburst showed a lack of self-control and acumen. Former Prime Minister Lee Kuan Yew, the man who many believe still runs Singapore and who is the current prime minister’s father, has said much the same things about Mr. Chee—“a political gangster, a liar and a cheat”—but that was at home, and in the heat of an election campaign.

Mr. Chee smiles when it’s suggested that he must be doing something right. “Every time he says something stupid like that, I think to myself, the worst thing to happen would be to be ignored. That would mean we’re not making any headway,” he agrees.

But one charge made by the government does stick: Mr. Chee is not terribly concerned about election results. Which is just as well, because his Singapore Democratic Party did not do very well in the May 6 polls. It would be foolish, he suggests, for an opposition party in Singapore to pin its hopes on gaining one, or perhaps two, seats in parliament. He is aiming for a much bigger goal: bringing down the city-state’s one-party system of government. His weapon is a campaign of civil disobedience against laws designed to curtail democratic freedoms.

“You don’t vote out a dictatorship,” he says. “And basically that’s what Singapore is, albeit a very sophisticated one. It’s not possible for us to effect change just through the ballot box. They’ve got control of everything else around us.” Instead what’s needed is a coalition of civil society and political society coming together and demanding change—a color revolution for Singapore.

So far Mr. Chee doesn’t seem to be getting much, if any traction. While many Singaporeans don’t particularly like the PAP’s arrogant style of government, the ruling party has succeeded in depoliticizing the population to the extent that anybody who presses them to take action to make a change is regarded with resentment. And in a climate of fear—Mr. Chee lost his job as a psychology lecturer at the national university soon after entering opposition politics—a reluctance to get involved is hardly surprising.

Why is all this oppression necessary in a peaceful and prosperous country like Singapore where citizens otherwise enjoy so many freedoms? Mr. Chee has his own theory that the answer lies with strongman Lee Kuan Yew himself: “Why is he still so afraid? I honestly think that through the years he has accumulated enough skeletons in his closet that he knows that when he is gone, his son and the generations after him will have a price to pay. If we had parliamentary debates where the opposition could pry and ask questions, I think he is actually afraid of something like that.”

That raises the question of whether Singapore deserves its reputation for squeaky-clean government. A scandal involving the country’s biggest charity, the National Kidney Foundation, erupted in 2004 when it turned out that its Chief Executive T.T. Durai was not only drawing a $357,000 annual salary, but the charity was paying for his first-class flights, maintenance on his Mercedes, and gold-plated fixtures in his private office bathroom.

The scandal was a gift for the opposition, which naturally raised questions about why the government didn’t do a better job of supervising the highly secretive NKF, whose patron was the wife of former Prime Minister Goh Chok Tong (she called Mr. Durai’s salary “peanuts”). But it had wider implications too. The government controls huge pools of public money in the Central Provident Fund and the Government of Singapore Investment Corp., both of which are highly nontransparent. It also controls spending on the public housing most Singaporeans live in, and openly uses the funds for refurbishing apartment blocks as a bribe for districts that vote for the ruling party. Singaporeans have no way of knowing whether officials are abusing their trust as Mr. Durai did.

It gets worse. Mr. Durai’s abuses only came to light because he sued the Straits Times newspaper for libel over an article detailing some of his perks. Why was Mr. Durai so confident he could win a libel suit when the allegations against him were true? Because he had done it before. The NKF won a libel case in 1998 against defendants who alleged it had paid for first-class flights for Mr. Durai. This time, however, he was up against a major bulwark of the regime, Singapore Press Holdings; its lawyers uncovered the truth.

Singaporean officials have a remarkable record of success in winning libel suits against their critics. The question then is, how many other libel suits have Singapore’s great and good wrongly won, resulting in the cover-up of real misdeeds? And are libel suits deliberately used as a tool to suppress questioning voices?

The bottling up of dissent conceals pressures and prevents conflicts from being resolved. For instance, extreme sensitivity over the issue of race relations means that the persistence of discrimination is a taboo topic. Yet according to Mr. Chee it is a problem that should be debated so that it can be better resolved. “The harder they press now, the stronger will be the reaction when he’s no longer around,” he says of Lee Kuan Yew.

The paternalism of the PAP also rankles, especially since foreigners get more consideration than locals. The World Bank and International Monetary Fund will hold their annual meeting in Singapore this fall, and have been trying to convince the authorities to allow the usual demonstrations to take place. The likely result is that international NGO groups will be given a designated area to scream and shout. “So we have a situation here where locals don’t have the right to protest in their own country, while foreigners are able to do that,” Mr. Chee marvels. Likewise, Singaporeans can’t organize freely into unions to negotiate wages; instead a National Wages Council sets salaries with input from the corporate sector, including foreign chambers of commerce.

All these tensions will erupt when strongman Lee Kuan Yew dies. Mr. Chee notes that the ruling party is so insecure that Singapore’s founder has been unable to step back from front-line politics. The PAP still needs the fear he inspires in order to keep the population in line. Power may have officially passed to his son, Lee Hsien Loong, but even supporters privately admit that the new prime minister doesn’t inspire confidence.

During the election, Prime Minister Lee made what should have been a routine attack on multiparty democracy: “Suppose you had 10, 15, 20 opposition members in parliament. Instead of spending my time thinking what is the right policy for Singapore, I’m going to spend all my time thinking what’s the right way to fix them, to buy my supporters’ votes, how can I solve this week’s problem and forget about next year’s challenges?” But of course the ominous phrases “buy votes” and “fix them” stuck out. That is the kind of mistake, Mr. Chee suggests, Lee Sr. would not make.

“He’s got a kind of intelligence that would serve you very well when you put a problem in front of him,” he says of the prime minister. “But when it comes to administration or political leadership, when you really need to be media savvy and motivate people, I think he is very lacking in that area. And his father senses it as well.”

However, the elder Mr. Lee’s death—he is now 82—is a necessary but not sufficient condition for change. Another big factor is how civil society is able to use new technologies to bypass PAP control over information and free speech. The government has tried to stifle political filmmaking, blogging and podcasting. Singapore Rebel, a 2004 film about Mr. Chee by independent artist Martyn See, was banned but is widely available on the Internet.

Meanwhile, pressure for Singapore to remain competitive in the region has sparked debate about the government’s dominant role in the economy. Can a top-down approach promote creativity and independent thinking? The need for transparency and accountability also means that Singapore will have to change. That is the source of Mr. Chee’s optimism in the face of all his setbacks: “I realize that Singapore is not at that level yet. But we’ve got to start somewhere. And I’m prepared to see this out, in the sense that in the next five, 10, 15 years, time is on our side. We need to continue to organize and educate and encourage. And it will come.”

He doesn’t dwell on his personal tribulations, but mentions in passing selling his self-published books on the street. That is his primary source of income to feed his family, along with the occasional grant. As to the charge of wanting to be a martyr, once he started dissenting, he found it impossible to stop in good conscience. “The more you got involved, the more you found out what they’re capable of, it steels you, so you say, ‘No, I will not back down.’ It makes you more determined.”

Perhaps it’s in his genes. One of Mr. Chee’s daughters is old enough that she had to be told that her father was going to prison. She stood up before her class and announced, “My papa is in jail, but he didn’t do anything wrong. People have just been unfair to him.”

Mr. Restall is editor of the REVIEW.

Elections over, PAP starts

2006-08-04T19:48:00.000+08:00

I can't believe the relentless hikes just keep coming and coming. First, its the electricity bill, then taxi, then buses & mrt(though its not confirmed yet offically but I confirm it for you here lah) and now even ERP also going up yet again. Sickening. Its really Paying And Paying.

What is more sickening of this raise, is that once again, residents living in the north, those that lan lan have to use CTE only as this is the only expressway to town from our world class infrastructure, those that is paying the highest rate of gantry charges, those that have to pay BOTH WAYS to and fro work, now have to pay even more.

Personally, I had been 'lucky' so far. Despite living and driving in the north for quite a few years now, I had never had to pay much ERP mainly because I don't work normal office hours. I have a friend that is not so lucky though, he lives in amk and due to his job nature, have to drive. His office is in Chinatown area, and even discounting the gantry fee into Chinatown itself, pure travelling along sets him back an average of $4-5 daily. (2x gantry on the way to work, 1x back). Sucks big time.

Why CTE always kena? Why all the people living in the north always being penalised? Reason is that this is where the majority of the people live. Though I don't have the figures on hand, I assume that mature estates such as AMK and Toa Payoh alone has a whole lot more residents than any other estates, and therefore more cars too. But its not the fault of these people that some 30-40 years ago, some guys come along and tell them to abandon their own 'unsanitary and unsafe' homes and move into these clean, cheap and safe housings. They were all told to gather there, to live there, and now that there is too many, just penalise them lor.

But is this constant raising of ERP prices really going to change things? I honestly do not think so. People that can avoid driving would have already done so, giving the already exhorbinate rates, is that $0.50 increase going to really going to make a driver say "Ok, thats it, I'm not paying that extra $0.50, I'm going to stop driving to work!" I don't think so. Most would simply shake their heads, sigh, and resigned themselves to their fate. Thats what I would do too.

So why the raise in ERP? Or the raise in everything in fact? Did the last election campaign used up too much resources? Or is it simply that it is believed that people would forget all the bad things that another few years down the road?

On Smoking

2006-08-03T02:37:00.000+08:00

Its been a month since the smoking ban is enforced in coffee shops etc, and to tell the truth, I have not seen much difference, i.e tables are not clearly marked smoking or non-smoking, and there are people that are still obviously smoking at the non-smoking area. However, there is significantly less number of smokers, and incidently I noticed at the coffee shop near my place, significantly less people drinking as well.

As a 'recovering' drinker and smoke-aholic, I seriously would feel 'incomplete' if I drink and not smoke. At least 90% of the people I know feel the same way, its like they come hand in hand. The coffeeshop's business sure is affected, and I shudder to think what will happen to the nightscene when the ban is extended to pubs and nightspots next year. I'm definately getting out of my pub venture before that happens. Sure, the govt and all the papers will tell you that it will attract more non-smokers to the club etc and in the LONG RUN, business will be better etc, but how are small businesses like ours, already scrapping to get by, see out the long run? If business goes down for more than a couple of months in tandem, cash flow is going to be a serious problem. Rents, payments to suppliers etc still have to be paid, and who is going to help us out? I don't need more non-smokers customers, I just want to keep my regular smokers customers. Can I implement a smoking only club instead? I'm sure I'll be making a ton more money than the ones that don't allow smoking. Just look at all the heavy drinkers and big spenders around you. How many of them are smokers compared to non smokers? I rest my case.

And to rub salt to the wound, I have enough of non-smokers complaining and complaining and urging for a ban on smoking in ALL public places. Give me a break. Give you an inch and you want a yard. Fuck you all. Although I don't really smoke now anymore, it still gets on my nerves how narrow minded some people are, touting their 'rights' to clean air or what ever fuck and attempt to exorcise all smokers. Knn, then don't come out lah, don't drive or stand near road because cars also pollute the air. And make sure you don't fucking fart in public places also else must ban farting liao. Stay in your sterile home.

As if Singapore is not restrictive enough as it is, and in case people tend to forget, smokers are human too and they have their feelings and rights too.

Job Hunting

2006-07-28T17:37:00.000+08:00

I had never imagined a job hunt being so difficult. While I am pretty confident of myself in terms of presentation and interviewing skills in general, I realised that the difficult part is in getting prospective employers to even take a look at you and grant you that elusive interview. I've sent out more than an estimate of over 30 copies of my resume, yet I have only attended one interview session, and that is a respond to a walk-in interview ad!

Maybe my expectations are too high, maybe my resume is poorly written, maybe employers nowadays are not really willing to pay and train fresh graduates who will later on move on to greener pastures. Or maybe its the economy(but the govt say its good leh!) or simply plain bad luck. I did went to the temple today though, so maybe my luck will change for the better soon :)

It better be soon. So freaking broke.

Story of Mr Brown

2006-07-23T19:19:00.000+08:00

Now on video :)

Story of Mr Brown

Wishful thinking

2006-07-15T00:34:00.000+08:00

I was hoping you would call/sms, or at least care abit about me, and this relationship.

Why am I always the one that have to make the first move everytime, no matter who is in the wrong?

Then again, you are never wrong are you? Its always me... yes... always me...

But I'm taking a stand this time.

I WILL NOT make the first move.

You have taken it for granted that I'll always be the one to take the step.

I SHALL NOT.

If you do not treasure the relation, maybe its time I stop caring too.

I'm just too tired.
Of all the nonsense
Of all the attitude
Of all the princess behavior
Of trying to satisfy all your whims
and of you not bothering about mine

I can't go on doing this on my own. I need help.

RockStar Supernova

2006-07-06T22:01:00.000+08:00

I did something that I never did in my entire life. I voted for a reality program!! Then again, the vote was online and doesn't cost me a cent so I though why not :P Plus, I really enjoyed the show, much more than any sillypore idol or super(boy)band and these guys(and gals) are really a class act. Even the lousiest performance are not half bad.

Maybe I'm just being biased cos I'm a huge rock fan. But this is simply the show that oozes attitude. What other show can you see the judges sitting with their legs up on the seats, tattoos and piercings galore from contestants to crowd to judges? Its just freaking cool. Check it out yourself.

Oh yah, and I voted for Dilana, check out her take on the Nirvana's classic.

Just for the record

2006-07-06T20:02:00.000+08:00

I see Mr Brown's piece becoming a 'classic' in the near future so I'm archiving it for my own reading pleasure. You can enjoy it too while you're here if you ~~have been living under a rock~~ haven't read it yet. For a quick and simple summary of the incident, read this post by Mr Wang

S'poreans are fed, up with progress! by Mr Brown

THINGS are certainly looking up for Singapore again. Up, up, and away.

Household incomes are up, I read. Sure, the bottom third of our country is actually seeing their incomes (or as one newspaper called it, "wages") shrink, but the rest of us purportedly are making more money.

Okay, if you say so.

As sure as Superman Returns, our cost of living is also on the up. Except we are not able to leap over high costs in a single bound.

Cost of watching World Cup is up. Price of electricity is up. Comfort's taxi fares are going up. Oh, sorry, it was called "being revised". Even the prata man at my coffeeshop just raised the price of his prata by 10 cents. He was also revising his prata prices.

So Singaporeans need to try to "up" their incomes, I am sure, in the light of our rising costs. Have you upped yours?

We are very thankful for the timing of all this good news, of course. Just after the elections, for instance. By that I mean that getting the important event out of the way means we can now concentrate on trying to pay our bills.

It would have been too taxing on the brain if those price increases were announced during the election period, thereby affecting our ability to choose wisely.

The other reason I am glad with the timing of the cost of living increases and wages going down, is that we can now deploy our Progress Package to pay for some of these bills.

Wait, what? You spent it all on that fancy pair of shoes on the day you saw your money in your account? Too bad for you then.

As I break into my Progress Package reserves to see if it is enough to pay the bills, I feel an overwhelming sense of progress. I feel like I am really staying together with my fellow Singaporeans and moving forward.

There is even talk of future roads like underground expressways being outsourced to private sector companies to build, so that they, in turn, levy a toll on those of us who use these roads.

I understand the cost of building these roads is high, and the Government is relooking the financing of these big road projects.

Silly me, I thought my road tax and COE was enough to pay for public roads.

Maybe we can start financing all kinds of expensive projects this way in future. We could build upgraded lifts for older HDB blocks, and charge tolls on a per use basis.

You walk into your new lift on the first floor, and the scanner reads the contactless cashcard chip embedded in your forehead. This chip would be part of the recently-announced Intelligent Nation 2015 plan, you know, that initiative to make us a smart nation?

So you, the smart contactless-cashcard-chip-enhanced Singaporean would go into your lift, and when you get off at your floor, the lift would deduct the toll from your chip, and you would hear a beep.

The higher you live, the more expensive the lift toll.

Now you know why I started climbing stairs for exercise, as I mentioned in my last column. I plan to prepare for that day when I have to pay to use my lift. God help you if some kid presses all the lift buttons in the lift, as kids are wont to do. You will be beeping all the way to your flat.

The same chip could be used to pay for supermarket items. You just carry your bags of rice and groceries past the cashierless cashier counter, and the total will be deducted from your contactless cashcard automatically.

You will not even know you just got poorer. And if your contactless cashcard runs out of funds (making it a contactless CASHLESS cashcard), you just cannot use paid services.

The door of the lift won't close, the bus won't stop for you, taxis will automatically display "On Call" when their chip scanners detect you're broke.

Sure, paying bills that only seem to go up is painful, but by Jove, we are going to make sure it is at least convenient.

No more opening your wallet and fiddling with dirty notes and coins. Just stand there and hear your income beeped away. No fuss, no muss! I cannot wait to be a Smart e-Singaporean.

I also found out recently that my first-born daughter's special school fees were going up. This is because of this thing called "Means Testing", where they test your means, then if you are not poor enough, you lose some or all of the subsidy you've been getting for your special child's therapy.

I think I am looking at about a $100 increase, which is a more than a 100 per cent increase, but who's counting, right? We can afford it, but we do know many families who cannot, even those that are making more money than we are, on paper.

But don't worry. Most of you don't have this problem. Your normal kids can go to regular school for very low fees, and I am sure they will not introduce means testing for your cases.

We need your gifted and talented kids to help our country do well economically, so that our kids with special needs can get a little more therapy to help them to walk and talk. And hey, maybe if the country does really well, the special-needs kids will get a little more subsidy.

Like I said, progress.

High-definition televisions, a high-speed broadband wireless network, underground expressways, and contactless cashcard system — all our signs of progress.

I am happy for progress, of course but I would be just as happy to make ends meet and to see my autistic first-born grow up able to talk and fend for herself in this society when I am gone.

That is something my wife and I will pay all we can pay to see in our lifetimes.

mr brown is the accidental author of a popular website that has been documenting the dysfunctional side of Singapore life since 1997. He enjoys having yet another cashcard, in addition to his un-contactless one and the ez-link one to add to his wallet.

My World Cup is over

2006-07-06T02:30:00.000+08:00

As far as I'm concerned, the World Cup is over for me. And what a sucky WC it had been this time round. No major upsets in the group stages, no dark horse, no surprises, and its the team that played the boringest football that will get to win this year's WC. I just hope its not the Italians for they play the dirtiest, most negative football in the world, and they shouldn't even have gone all the way if its not for the referee's bias in awarding that penatly that never was again australia, think if the Italians really won, they should give a medal to the referee too. Surely he's part of their team.

France is just... well.. being French. Pretendious, smooth sometimes, but always unreliable, especially with that ex-Manure ~~monkey~~ goalkeeper in goal. Portugal is just plain boring. 4-5-1 on an international stage? Safe but BORING with a capital B.

I just wished Brasil was still in. Or at the very least, after ~~kelonging~~ winning against argentina, germany should at least have the decency to make it into the final. But nooooo.... they have to lose to the mafias! If there is really one team that I despise, its the Italians. Even the french are not so replusive... then again... hmm..

Guess my best hope is that Portugal wins. Or maybe terrorist will strike and the WC will be cancelled and all matches and results deemed void and to be replayed again. But then again, going by my luck and predictions this WC, the final will probably be a bore between Italy v France, FT 0-0, ET 0-0, and the Italians winning on penalties. Damn. There is no God.

GRCs are meant to longbang new birds into parliament

2006-06-28T22:00:00.000+08:00

Been pretty sick the past couple of days/weeks, and thought that I was getting delirious when I saw this article.

-----------------------------------------------
27 June 2006
Straits Times

GRCs make it easier to find top talent: SM

Without good chance of winning at polls, they might not be willing to risk careers for politics
By Li Xueying

Senior Minister Goh Chok Tong yesterday gave a new take on the role of Group Representation Constituencies (GRCs) in Singapore politics. Their role is not just to ensure minorities are adequately represented in Parliament, he said. They also contribute to Singapore's political stability, by 'helping us to recruit younger and capable candidates with the potential to become ministers'.

'Without some assurance of a good chance of winning at least their first election, many able and successful young Singaporeans may not risk their careers to join po
litics,' Mr Goh said at an event marking the appointment of members to the South East Community Development Council (CDC).

'Why should they when they are on the way up in the civil service, the SAF, and in the professions or the corporate world?'

But he was quick to add that GRCs themselves do not guarantee victory.

'A minister wins only because he has won the people's trust and the Government has delivered good results for the people. If a minister performed poorly, it could result in his losing the GRC to an opposing team with a strong leader,' he said, in what appears to be an oblique reference to comments made against GRCs in the general election held this May.

Since GRCs were introduced in 1988, critics and the opposition have attacked them, saying they allow rookie People's Action Party (PAP) candidates to get into Parliament on the coat tails of heavyweight candidates in their team.

Also, they do not lend themselves to a level playing field, they add, as the opposition struggles to find the specified minority-race candidates.

Mr Goh carried four new faces into Parliament in the six-man Marine Parade GRC team, which was unchallenged at the 2006 polls.

Altogether, the PAP had 24 new faces. One was Mr Teo Ser Luck, former general manager of courier company DHL and now Parliamentary Secretary (Community Development, Youth and Sports).

He acknowledges that for a rookie politician, being part of a team ensures that 'you have a bigger chance of winning'.

'If you're fighting individually, you go through a steep learning curve and you may not have enough time,' he added.

East Coast GRC MP Lee Yi Shyan, who left his job as chief executive officer of IE Singapore and is today Minister of State (Trade and Industry), concurred 'If the system can remove as many impediments as possible, then the political system will be able to get more people to join.'

But both told The Straits Times they would have entered politics even if they had been fielded in a single-seat ward. Said Mr Lee with a laugh 'You could say that I'm more confident of myself!'

[truncated]

--------------------------------------------

Basically, what out dear SM has done, is admitting what the general public has known for years, what the PAP have publically denied time and again, on the REAL purpose of GRCs. After years of complains by oppositions duly shot down time and again, I wonder what made out SM came out and say this, especially now when there is no pressure from the opposition. In fact, SM Goh has been making quite a few comments that are unlike what you normally hear from PAP members, such as encouraging Potong Pasir and Hougang to apply for the funds that were promised to the opposition held wards by the PAP candidates, or his initial comments on the James Gomez affair. Miscommunication within the party? hmm....

It would be wishful thinking, but I was wondering, could it be that even SM Goh have had enough of the unfairness and opaqueness of our 'first class government'? He did herald an era of change that was a departure from the way of governing of MM Lee, was well-liked by most if not all singaporeans, maybe he had felt that there is a *gasp* need for the public to know?

Another logical reason I can think of, is that the PAP has simply gotten to the point that they are simply too arrogant to think that they can do anything wrong, and is not afraid to do or admit anything because they feel that it is not wrong for them to do so. It doesn't matter what the international community says, its 'our domestic issues' as they're bound to say. Local opinion matters even lesser as since when are we ever heard in the first place? Just sue whoever that has become abit too noisy for their liking, sure win anyway. (wonder if they'll admit to that anytime soon, we all know that already anyway so there's nothing to hide here)

The only voice they hear is their own, and surely, that is not healthy for the state of affairs to be??

Down on my luck

2006-06-27T02:19:00.000+08:00

I can't understand what is wrong with me recently, totally down on my luck. Losing yet another match due to a penatly, only this time it is in the last second of injury time. Thought I've seen the last of the boring, cheating, unsporting Italians, apparently they somehow survived... assholes have all the luck, no wonder I'm down on mine.

After 3 doctors, over $100 in medical bills, I AM STILL NOT CURED OF A STUPID COUGH! Not only that, I now have to suffer from rashes all over my body which is somehow still breaking out like nobody's business despite me stopping the antibotics for at least 3-4 days already and they are supposed to go away!! Made me missed my 2nd interview again as there is no way I can move around with these freaking itchy rashes around town, not to mention that I am actually having rashes on the SOLE OF MY FEET! Wtf is this... I can't even walk properly now!! I'm going to burn down the fucking clinic of the quack doctors!!!! arghhh.....!!!!! #!$%$#

Mongolian doctors

2006-06-24T20:41:00.000+08:00

One goes to a doctor when he/she is sick and seeks help in relieving their ordeal. What happens when instead of getting better, you get worse?? Freaking quacks!

I finally went to the doctors last week after suffering from a terrible cough for close to a month, after repeated naggings by my parents and girlfriend. It had become a source of irriation for me as well, causing me to go into a coughing fit everytime I attempt to complete a sentence that uses more than 10 words. The doctor gave me a customary once over, and proceed to prescribe me with antibotics, cough syrup and some loganzes.

Total time taken : less than 30 secs
Total damage : $26

Damn. I should have listened to my mum and studied harder in school so that I could have been a doctor when I grow up. Assuming I work 8 hours a day,

8hrs x 60mins x $26 = $12,480!! gross sales per day

For paying almost a $1 for every second I spend with the doctor, I would have liked to get some value for money, some free gifts or whatever, or at the very least, cure me! Instead, 2 days after taking the medication, I started to develop rashes all over the body, a terrible sore throat and swollen gums. Went back to the clinic again, this time was attended to by another doctor(the orginal doctor was away) which informed me that it is a possible allergy reaction to the antibotics. I would have like to have been informed about the possible allergy reaction BEFORE I took the medication, and the stupid doctor still have the cheek to tell me that my cough has gotten better and that most of my phelgm has cleared! Fuck you understand! I would rather have my cough back without the sore throat, swollen gums and freaking rashes thank you very much you fucking idiot! I can't believe the doctor actually said such a thing and I told her so. She just gave a shrug and told me such things 'just happens' and 'now we know you are allergic to it liao'. Its like, wtf....

Imagine if your computer had been infected with a virus, you take it down to a service center, which proceeds to clear your computer of the said virus, but at the same time, infected your computer with other viruses. You went back to the shop again and they charged you again to remove the other viruses, citing that 'these things happens', would you pay? But it seems like a normal occurance in the medical field, judging from the nonchalent reaction from the doctor. Is there any recourse for patients? Does CASE help in such cases?? I'm really pissed off and unwilling to take this lying down.

English speakers better meh?

2006-06-14T19:15:00.000+08:00

From Mr Brown

The ad in The Guardian's classifieds:
Organisation: MINISTRY OF EDUCATION SINGAPORE

Location: Asia & Australasia
Salary:
Date posted: 15 May 2006
Closing date: 15 Jun 2006

Ministry of Education
Moulding the Future of Our Nation

Be Different.
Teach in Singapore.

The Ministry of Education (Singapore) is looking for experienced, qualified native speakers of English to teach English as a first language, English Literature, Geography, History, Knowledge and Inquiry

We are looking for teachers who:
- Hold a relevant degree in English Language or Humanities (e.g. English Literature, Geography, History, etc.)
- Have a recognised Teaching Certificate in teaching English (e.g. PGCE, TESOL, TEFL, etc.) or relevant teaching subject (e.g. Geography, History, etc.)

Newly qualified teachers are encouraged to apply but they MUST have completed the induction year.

You can look forward to:
- An attractive remuneration package (including medical and dental benefits, and bonus upon successful completion of contract), depending on qualifications and verifiable working experience
- Relocation allowance (one-time baggage and lodging allowance, free economy air passage for candidate, spouse and 2 children below the age of 18 to Singapore on first appointment)
- Return air passage upon successful completion of contract
- Interest-free settling-in loan

You can view the video recording of our online career seminar held on 23 April 2006 on the website.

All terms and conditions are subject to review and change from time to time without prior notification. The Ministry of Education (Singapore) reserves the right to decide on the terms and conditions to be offered. No reasons will be provided for selection and non-selection of candidates.

----------------------------------------------------

I'm seriously quite annoyed by the decision by MOE, is it yet another case of foreign talent better than locals? As if we do not have enough competition already in every industry. And spare me the globalisation crap too, I seriously do not believe it is the issue here.

Just wondering, remember the 'problem' we had some time back with declining standards of chinese? We 'sloved' the problem by lowering the standard of Chinese teaching in singapore! It was decided that chinese was too 'difficult' to learn and that it is sufficent to be able to converse in such a way that people can understand you, or simply be able to read it is enough. Now, why is it that reasons given back then are not valid for this situation? I'm sure be it Singlish or the Queens English, the gist of the message can still be conveyed acrossed, and I do not doubt that any half baked singaporeans versed in singlish is unable to read anything written in proper english.

While I may be considered one of those younger generation that is more comfortable in english compared to chinese, I am still nevertheless very proud of my heritage, and I'm seriously concerned and appalled at the further falling of chinese standards, as well as the total disrespect that I feel it is receiving. Why is the chinese language not getting the same level of respect or importance as english? Is it due still to our colonialism past??

Birthdays

2006-06-14T02:38:00.000+08:00

It came and it went, just like any other day. Nothing special, nothing spectular, just the way I like it. I can't remember the last time I actually 'celebrated' it on my own accord, though good friends and family usually would have a cake and dinner etc for me, which while I truly appreciate, doesn't exactly make me comfortable.

I guess I'm one of those types that is not a 100% comfortable being the center of attraction. The part about birthdays that I especially hate was when people are gathered all around the cake, singing a birthday song, while you just sit there, grinning ~~stupidly~~ happily and making a ~~fool out of yourself~~ birthday wish. It gets worse when your friends suddenly decides that it is a good time to sing different versions of the songs in chinese, cantonese, english etc, thus making a 30 seconds ~~torture~~ song x3. Just when you thought it won't get any worse, strangers that you hardly know or in actual fact do not even know and is not interested in knowing will come up to you, unidentified and possibly spiked drink in hand, ~~demanding you drink it~~ offering it to you and it would have been bad manners to reject it. Thankfully, none of this happen to me this year. :)

Quiet night out with only me and my gal. A simple, peaceful night. Thats all I ever want, and I'm grateful, that I managed to have just that.

World Cup Marathon

2006-06-11T02:24:00.000+08:00

I had initially intended to catch EVERY single match of the world cup, something that I had never been able to do due to work or study commitment. Unfortunately, I failed to do so on the very first day where I missed the Poland v Ecuador match due to the stupid ippt this morning. Waiting for the 3rd match of day 2 now, and not a bit tired despite only sleeping 4 hrs last night, but have to admit I almost fell asleep during the England v Paraguay match, it was THAT boring. After the Sweden & Trinidad & Tobago though, despite it being goal-less, had me on the edge of the seat for the entire 90 mins. Now thats football!

Think I'll have to miss a match or two tomorrow too as my gal will be looking to celebrate my bday with me, and I gotta spend some time with her too lah, else really become soccer 'widow' liao, keke.

Bad day

2006-06-10T11:07:00.000+08:00

knnbccb. My stupid running shoes that had served me faithfully for the last 5 years, and daily for the past 2 weeks, decide to choose this very day, on my IPPT test, to 'open its mouth' and I was left flapping my leg, hoping that the sole doesn't come off completely, and knnb made me failed my 2.4 by 20 seconds...

Damn you!! @#$%^%$#~!

绝对Super Band

2006-06-05T20:47:00.000+08:00

I had sworn off the show for weeks since all the rock bands are voted out one by one, with lame boybands making up the majority of the remaining ~~losers~~ contenders. Decided to give it another hr of my time again tonite, since after exams, I have loads of time on hand :P

One of the 1st thing I noticed, is that this lame-poser-can't-sing-for-nuts group called 夏日风 is still in the show! What the hell... they're really one of the reasons I stayed away from the show, and after so long they are still there siah... terrible...

迷路兵 is still around, as is J3 and lucify who can ask least sing or perform. Music-wise I think these are easily the top 3. Maybe I'm bais, but when you mention the word 'band', I would expect them to at least play some instruments, though Juz-B gets away with it, rather like the lame Brods that treats it like a karaoke session or something.

Really hard to keep the faith in local productions when this is all they can come up with. I really try to support local music as much as I can and we had some great bands like humpback oaks and concave scream, but its clear that the main focus is to earn your sms money rather than really give you a great music or programme. Looking forward to the start of Rockstar Supernova on star world instead.

Dun call people apunehneh anymore hor!

2006-06-03T03:04:00.000+08:00

Like to share this damn funny and well written entry I came across by ThugChic. It just about sums up what I was saying earlier in regards to racial situation in singapore.

http://frozenqueen.blogspot.com/2006/05/its-about-time.html

Evolution of Dance

2006-06-01T14:02:00.000+08:00

No, this is not 'Dance dance revoultion', but its every bit as entertaining.

I found myself cringing at some of the moves that we had at one point of our life danced to and it looks so tacky now. OMG. I really can't belive I did.

click here if you can't see the above

Does racial harmony exist in Singapore?

2006-05-29T19:48:00.000+08:00

Our pledge reads, "regardless of race, language or religion", how true is that really? Disregarding the rest of the pledge(especially the 'building a democratic society' part), are Singaporeans really equal?

Its common to hear different races being referred to in degratory terms such as 'noisy malays/mats/minas', 'stinky indians/bangalas', 'filthy chinese pigs' etc. Don't believe me? Just take a taxi and watch what the driver tells you when you pass by places like Gelyang Surei, Chinatown or Little Indian. (provided that both you and the driver are of the same race and not of the race in the particular place.) Why?? I really don't get it. Aren't all races ultimately still human?

A lady I talked to told me that she disliked malays cos they always make alot of noise at her void decks, playing guiters, or feeding stray cats. I call that the kampung sprirt(yours truly was raised in a kampung for 10 yrs of my life btw :P) Another told me she dislike all forgein workers, especially those that are 'black' cos they always look at her in a perverted way(come on, even I am guilty of that at one time or the other if the gal is really hot!) and she was flashed by one of them before in broad daylight.(ok, that I don't do, but I wonder if she had been flashed by a chinese, would she had been so adverse to the chinese, being one herself?) A malay lady friend told me she dislike the chinese gals in her class because she feels that they look down on her.(thats called elitism, I experienced it too back in school, I don't think it was about the race.)

Coincidently, I realised that most if not all complains I heard came from ladies. I'm not sure if its because woman pay more attention to details(or petty) as compared to guys. You only need to cross a gal once and you will pay for it your whole life, I'm sure many guys can attest to that. :)

Damn, I wanted to write more but I really must resume mugging for my marketing paper on wed. Next entry after wed. Wish me luck :)

Doing NS might harm the ears and hands of a violinist

2006-05-28T19:05:00.000+08:00

I saw this ST online forum letter titled "Doing NS might harm the ears and hands of a violinist" yesterday. I can't help but add this.

"Serving NS might harm the brain of intelligent people"

I kid you not.

Before entering the army, my IQ was rated at 198(really lah... or at least somewhere there, dun doubt :P), but after entering the army, it started dropping rapidly as I discovered to my horror, that you are not allowed to think! I can still hear my platoon sergeant screaming at me "Orders are meant to be followed, not to be questioned understand! you @!#$% recruit! Go run one round around the parade square!" Same thing happened throughout my whole army life, the advice from seniors was that when you questioned your superiors, it made them look bad even if you are right so you will be 'aimed'. Just do as they say, even if it is wrong, just wait for them to tell you how to correct it.

The motto then was "多做多错，少做少错，不做就不会错".

Roughly translated, it means "the more you do, the more errors there will be, the less you do, the less errors. If you do nothing, you will have no errors." I hate it, but I can't help agreeing that it really does work in the army. I just hope working life will not be like that. I would hate it if I have to muddle my way through life. I hoped NS haven't harmed my brain. At least not that much.

Movie Bloopers

2006-05-27T00:45:00.000+08:00

This email has been making its round a couple of times and in case you have not seen it, its funny. :P

A watch! And all along I thought they told time from the sun.

Nice product placement ad...

A walkie talkie?

For non chinese readers, the word says 'aeroplane'

My personal favourite. Though I can't be sure if thats a blooper. Maybe they're just trying to be as close to life as possible.

No NS deferment for violinist Ike

2006-05-26T00:45:00.000+08:00

Poor Ike. He will have to go thru NS like every other guy, and forgo what might be the best thing that ever happened to him. I have this to say to him. Blame Melvyn Tan. If not for him and the furore he caused with his famous $3000 fine for draft dodging, I dare say that Ike will have a much better chance of getting the deferment he craved.

To be fair, I believe no matter what the Ministry of Defence did, there will always still be people that will disagree with them. If the ministry allowed the deferment, no doubt there will be accusations that the Melvyn Tan incident has not caused the Ministry to 'wisen up', yet now that the Ministry decides to uphold its stance, people are accusing them instead of not being flexible, not contributing to Singapore's art scene. Its really a difficult job for them to perform.

Personally, I was one of those that was incensed by what Melvyn Tan did, and how lightly he got away with it. $3000, plus whatever it is that his parents managed to cough up as collateral to buy the blood, sweat and tears that I and thousands of other singaporean males have to put up with. It mocks the system in that those rich enough can just pay money as their way of 'national service'. No doubt coming back to serve the army might cause him to miss a chance of his lifetime, but many of us had our 'chance of a lifetime' taken away through national service, albeit not all of our 'chance of a lifetime' would make us world-reowned but I believe that was besides the point. For someone in the lower income class, their chance of a lifetime might have come in the form of a job offer for a stable job paying enough to lift the family out of the proverty trap. It might not mean anything much to rich asses like Melvyn nor does it make him famous, but can you not agree that it is that person's chance of a lifetime that might not come again at any other point of time? Why should another person be given preferential treatment just because he is richer, or precieved by the society to be more 'gifted' or smarter? It doesn't seem fair to me. I firmly believe that every individual should be treated equally regardless of race, language, religion, social class, or even his intelligence. As long as he is a Singaporean, he deserved to be treated as one.

My point is, yes, I pity that Ike have to suffer for the mistakes of someone else. But then again, he really might just turn out like Melvyn Tan, we never know. In this case, I applaud the decision by the Ministry of Defence to preserve the idea of equity among all males for once (remember the white horses?)

Tough luck Ike, but thats life, its never fair. They say army makes you a man, see, you are already starting to learn even before you are enlisted. :)

Piang! Lim Peh Kenna Tomorrowed.

2006-05-25T17:17:00.000+08:00

Was wondering why I got a sudden spike of traffic today. Realised that I 'kena tomorrowed'(who came up with this term anyway?) as I was reading my daily newsfeed. So I did exactly what all the ~~hao lian~~ self-respecting singaporeans will do, immediately looked for and added the 'kena tomorrowed' button to the site ~~for bragging rights~~ to link back to the site to thank them for their ~~devious scheme to force me to link back to them~~ support. Thank you. Really.

I must revise my views on young punks people

2006-05-21T18:31:00.000+08:00

I've taken to a new hobby over the last couple of months, what I termed as 'blog-surfing'. I'll just click on a random blog and from there one of their random links and so on, until I find something interesting to read. I remembered reading her blog some time back, and I remember being very impressed by her articulate thinking, although sometimes her england was too powderful and kinda made me lost in the midst of her bombastic vocabulary of words. She was in the news lately due to the largely published issue of her 'debate(?)' with a minister. It was only then did I realise that she is just 17 years old!

I'm a full 10 years older than her, and I doubt I can write like she do. My impression of 17 year olds' blogs revolve around having an irritating background music that you can't shut off, loud pink flashing background pictures, loads of act cute pictures taken with the cellphone and terms like 'darling', 'dar dar', 'lao gong', and normally the entries are TyPE iN aN iRriTatInG aNd dIfFiCuLt tO ReAd wAy LiKe TiS. I could not believe that a 17 year old young ~~punk~~ kid can use words like 'authoritarianism' in a blog entry, takes an active interest in politics and current affairs, able to sieve through junk that we call the local media and come up with clear and articulate view, and most impressively, reads John Lewis Gaddis!! Have I really been underestimating these young people all along??

I think back to what I was 10 years ago. Nowhere.close.at.all.

At 17, I was more concerned on where to go after school.
At 17, I was more concerned in breaking that street fighter record.
At 17, I was more concerned in being popular with girls.
At 17, I was more concerned in deciding which girl to date come weekend.
At 17, I was more concerned in getting myself yet another versace jeans.
At 17, I was more concerned in counting down to my 18 birthday so that i can ~~legally buy~~ try alcohol and cigarettes.

I wish I was ~~so serious about current affairs~~ 17 again... :(

Bored

2006-05-21T01:54:00.000+08:00

Bored... Went job hunting online. Kinda fun. :D

Wasn't too eager to start working though. Had planned to enjoy my world cup and maybe take a long vacation before starting my job hunt. But looking at the jobs on offer makes me both keen yet fearful of getting a job. I love challenges, and every job looks like a challenge to me. I have no idea what field I wish to target even now, I'm so indecisive and tempted to try everything! Typical bloody gemini... Sent my resume to a 3 or 4 firms that looked too good to be missed, even though I will only graduate in July(provided I pass) and all the jobs required experiences. Hope I at least get a reply from at least a couple of them. Fingers crossed. :x

Change of address

2006-05-20T23:42:00.000+08:00

Taking a break from mugging.... phew...

Didn't know that blogger allows you to change your address like that without having to create a whole new blog. Pretty cool I must say. But then the old address is just gone with no redirection to this new address. Doesn't really matter though, no one reads this shit anyway. :P

Following THAT maths paper, the rest of the papers so far had been ok. Undergone a scare though when I reached the exam hall and realised that I had forgotten to bring my calculator for my stats paper! My heart almost jumped out of my mouth right there and then! To make things worse, the paper was held at the Singapore Expo and not in school so I can't just go up to some random strangers and attempt to borrow from them, the people there are all going for the same paper and I dun think anyone is crazy enough to bring a spare calculator(although I know thats what my sis used to do, but then, she's a freak) and there are no bookshops or whatever there that was open at 9am in the morning. I seriously contemplated going to the nearest housing estates to knock on doors to see if anyone had a calculator that I could borrow, that was how desperate I was. Luckily, I remembered seeing a 7-11 there when I went the pick up my gal the other day and I thought I should try my luck there, even if they sell a simple non-scientific calculator that allowed me to do normal calculations would be better than nothing. Unfortunately, they dun. Luckily, when I asked the staff there whether they have any idea where I can get a calculator urgently as my exam is starting in like 10 mins time, one of them whipped out one and offered it to me! There are kind people in singapore after all!! I was so relieved. Even though the calculator couldn't perform certain functions that was required, it probably saved me from another disaster like THAT maths paper. At least I'm sure I'll pass this paper, though if I had my calculator along, I could probably be confident of scoring at least a B, but hey, I'm not complaining! It could have been so much worse!

The Software Engineering paper was a breeze. I was worried that I might not have enough materials to bullshit my way through the 3 hr paper, but I ended up writing the most I ever did in an exam, and still managed to finish the paper with time to spare. Now thats something new~! 2 more papers to go till freedom!!!

Worst.Exam.Ever

2006-05-11T18:38:00.000+08:00

Started my 1st paper of my final year today, and it was totally my worst.paper.ever. I can't recall the last time in all my years of taking exams that I actually felt like I was going to flunk the paper. !@$%#^&*^!!! and to think that I actually studied for it~!!!! what is going on! Topics that had NEVER EVER appeared in the exams before pop up in not one but two sect B questions, probably costing me a minimum of 10 points for nothing. Sect A qns are supposed to be the short and simple ones, but they are neither short, nor simple. I actually think I might fail this paper. Sux big time. All my hard work over the past 2 yrs would have gone to nought if I really failed this as it would practically ruin my shot at honours... knnbccb. I'll end up just like one of those people that failed multiple modules and end up with a degree without a honours. what was all my hard work for? why do I have to fall at the final hurdle?? totally demoralised for the rest of the papers now, wondered why I'm bothering to study anymore. Just scrap a pass in each and every one left will do. FUCK.

Polling Day

2006-05-06T15:42:00.000+08:00

Cast my vote for the 1st time in my life today. After all the hype and emotional tug of war, it was a surprising underwhelming experience.

Lessons was not cancelled for my class today despite it supposingly being a bloody public holiday. So anyway, I only went to vote after I came back from class which was around 1pm. Accordingly to my parents, the queue was very long in the morning, apparently all the aunties and uncles are sibei kiasu and have nothing better to do so early morning go queue up and cast vote. Singaporeans really like to queue... -.-"

When I reached there at 1pm, I almost had trouble finding the place if it was not for the police cordon of the area. Place was pratically deserted save for a bored looking policeman and a couple of tables and chairs and the people manning them. I just handed over my polling card, and after checking my IC, asked me to proceed to counter 3. I was abit kaypoh and asked the uncle why must go until counter 3 when the rest of the counters are empty anyway(being the lazy bugger, I'll do anything to save walking a few steps :P) I was informed that my name list is under counter 3 so I have to get my ballot ticket there. At the counter, handed over my IC again and this time, a woman checked my IC against a list, crossed out my name, and passed it to the guy next to her. The guy then wrote my polling notification ticket number onto half of the ballet sheet, and tore the other half out for me. Before passing it to me though, he shouted across the table to another guy the serial number on my ballot sheet and my polling ticket who duly took down the information. Guess this is why many rumours abound that the ruling party can actually check your votes so that they know who voted against them etc. I guess it is really theoritically quite possible and easy if the party really wants to trace the party you vote, but then again, I dun see them wasting their resources on it while it reaps no direct benefits. After collecting the ballot ticket, I walked a couple of steps to the oddly shaped table to select the party of my choice, and walked back a couple of steps to drop the ticket into a flimsy looking cardboard box sitting on a chair, and that was it. The whole process took me less than 5 minutes.

Personal thoughts: I must say that the first time I saw the ballot box, I was rather shocked at its flimsy look. I've seen shopping centers with bigger and nicer boxes for lucky draws and they come with a lock. The boxes for the deciding the fate of a country looks like something you packed your tv set in, complete with the masking tape and all. Kinda wonder what would happen if it rains later when they transport the boxes to the counting station... those boxes sure doesnt look waterproof to me... another point of note is that, once I got the ballot paper, I was kinda left on my own. I supposed that was to allow me to mantain the secrecy of the vote, but somehow, I could have simply walked out without casting my vote. Wondered if they had security cameras there that could have seen me splashed all over the headline news though.. :D

Job done for the day, now we can only sit back and wait for the results. Hope I had made a difference today. :)

Technorati tags:singapore election polls singaporeelection polling pollingday

Polling day tomorrow

2006-05-05T20:43:00.000+08:00

Tommorrow is the day of where we cast our vote to determine the political party that will take us throught he next 4 years. It is a forgone conclusion as to who will win, but after years of apathy, at least this time, I have a say.

Being a first time voter at the age of 27, I admit that I know close to nothing about the political situation in my very own backyard prior to the last couple of years. Like many other young voters like me, what we know of politics is only through the mainstream media, and some coffeeshop talk here and there. But I always remain indignant about the fact that estate upgrading was used as the carrot(or stick depending on how u see it) for voting the ruling party. I should know. I was in the infamous Cheng San ward that 'dared' to nearly vote out the PAP. Tension was high in my area that time, and although I was largely unaware of the facts, I remembered being pretty pissed at being threaten, by our very own govt no less. Alot of others probably felt the way I did, and it was reflected in the poll results. Cheng San ward duely ceased to existed in the next election, carved up and absorbed into larger GRCs respectively. I remembered being pretty shocked as I was due the vote in that election and I wasn't even aware that there was such a thing as a electoral boundrary redraw prior to every election. The 'independent' committee decisions, to this day, never convienced me of it independancy. How is it that they can lie to your face and say that their 'independent' decisions that always seem to coincide with the ruling party interests, when it is clear to everyone with one eye and half a brain that it obviously is not? Talk about transparency.

I really believe that the power of the internet comes into play alot this election. If not for the internet and great sites such as sgrally and the unbeliveably insightful yawining bread, would you have seen these pics in the mainstream media?

Attended rallies for the 1st time in my life. Its really quite an unbelievable experience. Totally electrifying. Granted, I only attended oppositions rallies, but my rationale was that the ruling party get to dominate 99% of all media and I get to see their speeches, arguments etc being splashed all over the papers and repeated in every news channel anyway while the oppositions hardly get much, if any air time. The opposition made some good points, one that especially caught my attention was the idea of WP chief Mr Low's idea to peg the ministers pay to the lowest 20% earners in singapore, with a multipication factor of 100. So if the low income earns $800 per mth, the minister gets $80,000 per mth. If the lowest income increases to $1000, the minister will get 100,000 per mth, similarly, if the lowest income drops, the ministers pay drop as well. This is to ensure that the minister will try their best to help the lower income families as it directly affects them as well. Similarly, his idea of asking the govt to make transport services a 'cost-recovery' service instead of a profit driven one also hits close to home, althought I have doubts on its similar calls for other areas such as power supply etc.

On the PAP side, I have not heard any issues or ideas coming from them other than their attempts to scandalise the James Gomez issue, the usual threats of non-estate upgrading with the added lift upgrades this time, and the usual 'look at our track record' vein.

On a whole, prior to polling day, I'm still not too sure it which is the party that best serves my needs. However, I will be asking the following question that I believe will aid my decision. Which party is truly more into serving me and my needs, rather than me serving them and their needs??

Technorati tags:singapore election polls singaporeelection

Brain dead

2006-05-03T01:25:00.000+08:00

If I do a single more question on integration, I think my head is gng to explode and I'll go into spasms.... the problem is, even after practicing so much, I'm still not totally getting it~! arghh...

At least I think I can safely say that I'm not gng to flunk it come exam time, but I really think its a bloody waste of my time to spend so much time and effort on it if I'm not gng to get an A or something out of it. I have not started on any of my other modules yet and I'm really hoping that I can get a set of great results this year to pull up my level of honours that was doomed by my disastrous first year results... sigh... really regret... Hope I dun end up with a 3rd class honours, it already sucks being a 2nd class citizen, imagine being one with a 3rd class honours in our ~~meritocracy~~ ~~elitism~~ 1st class society.

Taking my mind off studies, exams and politics for a moment, I somehow came to realise what an asshole I am sometimes. I really think I have a split personality, how else can you explain the fact that I can be one moment someone who is so righteous and upright about what is right or wrong, black or white, with no grey areas, while a moment later, I can be the most unscruplous s.o.b that is not above lying, cheating or stealing so as to achieve my aims. Or have I really become so practical and pragmatic that I can on one hand hold a set of principles and beliefs while on the other hand, apply them flexibly, weighing the opportunity costs to see if it was worthwhile to hold my belief at that point of time? What have I become??? And I can come up with a 101 warpped reasons to justify my actions no less.

Somedays, I petrify even myself.

Think about it.

2006-05-02T18:11:00.000+08:00

This caught my interest from an episode of 'Boston Legal', and I was thinking how it make sense in recent context.

“When the Nazis arrested the Communists,
I said nothing; after all, I was not a Communist.
When they locked up the Social Democrats,
I said nothing; after all, I was not a Social Democrat.
When they arrested the trade unionists,
I said nothing; after all, I was not a trade unionist.
When they arrested the Jews, I said nothing; after all, I was not a Jew.
When they arrested me, there was no longer anyone who could protest.”

Martin Niemöller (1892—1984)

News you will never see in the local media

2006-05-02T18:02:00.000+08:00

I'm getting more and more disillusioned with the level of reporting in the local media. Granted, I only read the Straits Time(daily), the NewPaper and CNA occasionally, but it is really during this election period that I can see how biased and the knack for narrow reporting that the singapore media is.

Think you will ever see coverage of the Enernorth lawsuit, or the outcome if it is not 'desirable'? I'll be following it keenly, just not on the local media.

Soccer fever

2006-04-30T17:24:00.000+08:00

Damn, my world cup channel has not been activated yet, a couple more days and i'll missed the early bird price... stupid starhub better get it sorted out...

Mind numbing couple of days while preparing hard for my final exams, and trying to keep up with all the election news and stuff. Took some time out last nite to catch my favorite newcastle team in action, despite not winning, they effectively dumped another team out of the EPL in consecutive weeks. Pity about slumberland though, it would have been so much sweeter if they could have just held on for another week so that we can send them down to where they belong :P I love to see teams getting relegated, more so than seeing a team winning the championship, yet more often then not, I like to support the underdog... I'm such a sadistic contradicting sucker... :D

Phone for sale....

2006-04-23T17:10:00.000+08:00

Selling my phone... anyone interested??

Nearly one year old HP6365 PDA phone for sale. Warrenty until May 06, in perfect condition save for some normal wear and tear, willing to extend warrently personally for another month. Quality screen protector($30 ) on from day one.

Comes with everything you get in a standard package including
- Box, manuals and CDs containing MS Outlook 2002
- Cradle and charger
- Handfree set
- Detachable keyboard

Throwing in additional
- Sony Ericsson Bluetooth headset HBH-602 with the exchangeable Style-Up covers in different colours (Blue/Silver/Black)
- OGO bluetooth headset with USB charger and Car charger for people on the go
- Toshiba 256MB Mini-SD card with adapter
- Free software packages for work or play

Email me or leave a comment if interested

S.T.U.P.I.D: "Singaporean Terrorist United People's Institute of Destruction"

2006-04-22T17:52:00.000+08:00

One hell of a funny video by a group of malaysians.

An ode to Singapore

2006-04-19T16:24:00.000+08:00

In Singapore, the majority of us live in Highly Dangerous Buildings (HDB),
And most people have already got used to Paying And Paying (PAP).
Not only do you have to pay, you Pay Until Bankrupt (PUB).
If that is not enough, somebody still Purposely Wants to Dig (PWD) and get more from you.
So what more can you do when you are in the Money Only Environment (MOE)?
With the current Mad Accounting System (MAS), you are forced to Pay the Sum Ahead (PSA).
Which will leave some people Permantly Owing Some Banks (POSB).
And forced to live on the Loan Techniques Always (LTA) system.
When you fall sick and happen to be admitted to a Money Operating Hospital (MOH),
You might be able to use your Cash Prior to Funernal (CPF) fund.
If you are out of luck, you may meet doctors who Never Use Heart (NUH) to treat you,
And you will be Sure to Give up Hope (SGH).
To help ease the traffic, motorists have to pay Cash On Expressway (COE).
If that doesn't help, they can always Eternally Raise Price (ERP) on the roads.
If you don't own a car, you can always make a Mad Rush to the Train (MRT),
OR get squashed in a bus Side By Side (SBS).
Lastly, under all these pressures, there are not many places we can relax,
Not even the good old place we used to go because it has become
So Expensive And Nothing TO See Actually (SENTOSA)!!

I'm happy when I'm feeling evil

2006-04-15T02:32:00.000+08:00

You Are 48% Happy

You're definitely a happy person, even though you have your down moments.

You tend to get the most out of life, though there's always some more happiness to be squeezed.

How Happy Are You?

You Are 62% Evil

You are very evil. And you're too evil to care.

Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot.

How Evil Are You?

I wonder... Are they in any way related....?

Addiction

2006-04-15T01:55:00.000+08:00

Got myself yet another tattoo again on wednesday. :) I finally decided to do a big scale 'project' that will effectively link all my tattoos together into a nice big concept instead of having them individually on various parts of the body. 'Stamp collecting' as my tatto artist calls them. That evil guy :P

Took almost an hour discussing the idea with the artist and ideas flew back and fro, fast and furiously. Which was real great and I enjoyed it, compared to many other tattoo studios that I went to that simply seems more interested in just earning your money, and do not have much of a constructive input. They basically do not care about what you do to your body, you can tell them you wanna tattoo a hello kitty next to a demonic skull and they'll tell you its a good idea and how nice it would be while showing you pictures of flash that they had used on their previous customers and be real quick to quote you a price. Although this fellow charges significantly higher than the others, I do feel more confident, not to mention comfortable, in him. I know that my concept will be unique, my design will be unique, and there is zero chance that there will be anyone in singapore or even the world that will have a similar tattoo as mine. (maybe bits and pieces but definately not overall :P) What price can you put on your skin? Money can always be earned back easily, but a tattoo is not easy to reverse.

Almost forgot how painful it was and almost jumped when the needle first entered my skin. Took a while to get used to it and the slow numb trobbing continued for the next two hours. A new artist this time, a new design, a new concept. But the addiction remains. Can't wait for the next session. With exams round the corner and cash flow running low, can't exactly do as much or as fast as I would have liked. Hopefully can get the whole thing done by the end of this year. That'll be a nice xmas present for myself. :)

Personal Dna Report

2006-04-11T22:13:00.000+08:00

Pretty accurate stuff...

My Personal Dna Report

Try it!

Question of the day

2006-04-06T13:25:00.000+08:00

In reading the following articles in the papers today, firstly, the comments by PAP's Mr Wong Kan Seng that 'Opposition has done little to benefit Singaporeans'and the follow up article(which incidently was hidden in a corner of the papers with no big font titles or picture unlike the former article) 'Opposition MPs defend their record in Parliament', the first thought that came to mind was

"Can the opposition sue the PAP for defamation?"

Wouldn't it be interesting to see if and how the court will handle it?

What is the likelihood that it is all a big plot/bait so that the PAP can somehow turn it around and counter sue the opposition, driving them to bankruptcy, making them unable to run for elections, and thus getting a clean sweep of all wards?

I love politics :)

Why?

2006-04-06T00:08:00.000+08:00

- Why is everything I do nowadays is wrong?

- Why is it that the same thing, when done by someone else is deem nice and sweet, but when I am the one doing it, it is expected of me?

- Why is it so difficult to show some appreciation for the things I do?

- Why do you always like to compare?

- Why can't you just accept and love me like the way you did when we first met?

- Why do I feel that we are drifting further and further apart? Are we really so comfortable with each other that we don't even bother to talk anymore cos we expect each other to understand what we want or think?

- Why is it that I feel that you are no longer putting in any effort in this relation?

- Why is it that despite all these, I never once thought of ending this relation....

Funny signs

2006-04-03T02:38:00.000+08:00

The problem about direct translation...

Some just don't get it

2006-04-01T16:24:00.000+08:00

With the elections drawing closer, its kinda funny in a way to see the ruling party and the various government departments falling over themselves in trying to discredit the opposition. The idea of pseudo-opposition PAP MP, HDB trying to justify why opposition wards are not granted permission to upgrade lifts in estate, criticism of WP manifesto etc. It just reeks of a typical singaporean trait. Kiasuism.

I simply do not understand why the PAP needs to be so kiasu. So what if the opposition holds 2 or more seats in the parliament? Theres a total of 84 seats, 2 oppositions would make up a neligable 2.38% which could hardly make a difference when it comes to the passing of bills especially with the fact that PAP members can't vote according to their conscience anyway.

Their repeated bashing of oppositions, sometimes to the point of a bully taunting a kid in the playground, is really starting to put me off. The threat of non-upgrading to the estate, which is funded by our own money, is simply sickening. Imagine this happening in a private property sector. A property developer build 10 blocks of flats and touts them as a premium, low cost and highly subsidised flats. Each block will have a leader to represent them at the estate committee. Monthly conservation fees are collected from all residents, yet upgrades to the estate are done to only 8 blocks, leaving 2 blocks on their own, because the funds were not made available to the 2 leaders of the blocks because they tend to disagree with the other leaders on certain issues. Instead, the money collected from the 2 blocks are used to subsidise the other 8 blocks, and the committee tells you that you can only have upgrading when you replace the 2 leaders. But it so happens that these 2 leaders of the block are more capable than many of the other leaders of the 8 blocks and the people know it and thus would like to keep them to represent the blocks. The residents of these 2 blocks will probably bring the issue up to court for the unfair treatment they received, but then, does residents of opposition wards have this ability? Or as CSJ would like to lead us to believe, is the judiciary system fair and open to dissentient?

I also cannot stand the fact that the ruling party keeps asking the opposition to 'be like us'. What is the point of that then? The whole idea of an opposition is to give a different view, a different perception. If the opposition is supposed to mimic the ruling party, might as well go and set up a second party called PAP v2 or PAP reserve and as them to compete. Kaoz.

For example, when they are revealing their new faces recently, they keep asking the opposition to reveal their candidates too, for 'transparency' and 'opening them up for public scrutiny'. Hell, why should the opposition do that just because you are doing it? When they release their manifesto and you openly criticised it, even implying that some points were 'copied'. Yet when request to open up their own manifesto for scrutiny, the cocky reply was that they when do so when they feel the time is right. Arrogance, fueled no less by the power they hold in their hands. Power, that if left unchecked, may well bring down the system in a couple of generations...

gems of wisdom

2006-03-30T20:23:00.000+08:00

The real question shd be, "What's so disastrous about having a few more opposition MPs".

I heard the learned minister say that they do not want the 5th C - conformity. He wants to see lively, robust debates etc etc. Obviously, they are not having that now becos most of the MPs look like they are half asleep.

# posted by kampong boy : Friday, March 24, 2006 10:44:40 AM

Lydia Lim- "I think its pointless to vote for an opposition candidate who clearly lacks the ability to scrutinise and critique policies in an inteliigent way."

"Retrenchment is good for singapore. If there is no retrenchments, then I worry."- SM Goh

"The opposition's plans to 'give and give' will lead to $ingaporeans having to pay higher taxes in order to foot the bill, General Lee Hsien Loong said at a rally in Tampines."- then DPM Lee in 2001

"$2.6b "Progress Package" for lower-income groups, elderly, NSmen"- now PM Lee in 2006

"Contrary to public perception, the White Horse classification is not to ensure that sons of influential men gets preferential treatment. Instead it is to ensure that they do not get preferential treatment."- Cedric Foo

"I don't think that there should be a cap on the number of directorship that a person can hold."- PAP MP John Chen who holds 8 directorships

"It's not for the money because some of the companies pay me as little as $10,000 a year."- PAP MP Wang Kai Yuen who holds 11 directorships.

"We are not considering a casino but an IR- an integrated resort. IRs are quite different."- George Yeo

"If you want to dance on a bar top, some of us will fall off the bar top. Some people will die as a result of liberalising bar top dancing .... a young girl with a short skirt dancing on it may attract some insults from some other men, the boyfriend will start fighting and some people will die."- Vivian Balakrishnan

"I would want to form an alternative policies group in Parliament, comprising 20 PAP MPs. These 20 PAP MPs will be free to vote in accordance with what they think of a particular policy. In other words, the whip for them will be lifted. This is not playing politics, this is something which I think is worthwhile doing."- SM Goh

"If you sing Jailhouse Rock with your electric guitar when others are playing Beethoven, you are out of order. The whip must be used on you."- SM Goh again, on a dramatic u-turn, rethink or backtrack, whatever you call it.

"THE National Kidney Foundation (NKF) spends more than 80 per cent of its funds on its beneficiaries."- Lim Hng Khiang

"Save on one hairdo and use the money for breast screening."- another gem from Lim Hng Kiang

"We started off with (the name) and after looking at everything, the name that really tugged at the heartstrings was in front of us. The name itself is not new, but what has been used informally so far has endeared itself to all parties."- Mah Bow Tan on the $400 000 exercise to rename Marina Bay as Marina Bay.

"Having enjoyed football as a national sport for decades, we in Singapore have set ourselves the target of reaching the final rounds of World Cup in 2010."- Ho Peng Kee

"Only 5% are unemployed. We still have 95% who are employed."- Yeo Cheow Tong. Duh.

"Singaporean workers have become more expensive than those in the USA and Australia."- Tony Tan

“People support CPF cuts because there are no protest outside parliament."- PM Lee

"No, it was not a U-turn, and neither was it a reversal of govt policy. But you can call it a rethink."- Yeo Cheow Tong

"...I regret making the decision because, in the end, the baby continued to be in intensive care, and KKH now runs up a total bill of more than $300,000..."- Lim Hng Kiang, regretting the decision to save a baby's life because KKH ran up a $300 000 bill

"If we want to be a world-class city, if we want to be a nation that has got very good standards of public hygiene and cleanliness, the best place to start with is the public toilet."- Amy Khor, PAP MP

"Restoring the pay cuts of civil servants and ministers is reasonable as Singapore's economy has now regained momentum."- Ng Eng Hen

"I don't think my reading for the economy is strong enough for us to even consider asking for the restoration of the cut in CPF."- Lim Boon Heng

"If we ever introduce anything like quotas or incentives based on race, it will reinforce the perception that Malays and Indians have low skills and can only get jobs because of an incentive or quota."- Tharman Shanmugaretnam

"These schools (SAP schools) need to remain essentially Chinese to give the edge in interacting with China..."- self contradictory statement made by Tharman Shanmugaretnam again

"We must encourage those who earn less than $200 per month and cannot afford to nurture and educate many children never to have more than two... We will regret the time lost if we do not now take the first tentative steps towards correcting a trend which can leave our society with a large number of the physically, intellecually and culturally anaemic."- MM Lee in 1967

"If you don't include your women graduates in your breeding pool and leave them on the shelf, you would end up a more stupid society...So what happens? There will be less bright people to support dumb people in the next generation. That's a problem."- MM Lee in 1983

"The PAP Government has always thrived on its ability to anticipate problems."- Wong Kan Seng

"We are not able to be everywhere as a government to know everthing in Singapore"- PM Lee

Some of the gems of wisdom uttered by our PAP MPs and ministers.

Only in Singapore

2006-03-29T15:57:00.000+08:00

I am becoming increasingly disillusioned with the state of events we call 'politics' here in Singapore.

Where else in the world can you find a ruling party that has total control over every single little thing in our life, and to prevent people for so called 'opposing for the sake of opposing' and voting opposition players, sugguested that they have their own MPs act as opposition MPs. This is one of the more ridiculous ideas I've heard in recent times. It has the potential of turning the entire parliment system into a sideshow. When these PAP 'opposition' members really speak up, would you question their integrity? I would. Questions asked are likely to be 'safe' type of questions, or may even be scripted and veto beforehand by the PAP already, with a ready solution already so that it would make the PAP look even more efficient. It'll be like some fake reality shows, except that whatever consequences of stupid decisions made by the contestants affect not them, but you and me.

Another much talked about issue of upgrading of estates and lift upgrading also irks me. I have just a simple view of things. Are those people living in opposition wards not singaporeans? Do they not pay their taxes? Do they not contribute to the singapore economy as a whole? Why then are they subjected to such unfair treatment? Why are grants not given to opposition wards? Even when they are, they are distributed in channels that ensures that only PAP supporters benefits. WHY?

Maybe opposition leaders such as Mr Chiam or Mr Low such ask for tax cuts for people in their wards. Why should they be helping to pay or subsidise other wards upgrading projects? It just doesnt seem fair.

Another victim of disneyland?

2006-03-25T18:11:00.000+08:00

Is it just me or does this looks suspiously like Pluto...?

Journey of Life

2006-03-23T15:46:00.000+08:00

Your entire life summed up in a single picture.

tattoos

2006-03-23T00:10:00.000+08:00

I just realised how difficult it is to find a tattoo studio in singapore with a decent website. A google search turns up the same couple of studios that have not updated their sites for years. (yes, I google around when I was planning to get my 1st tattoo like 4-5 years ago and the sites and pics I got back are EXACTLY the same)

Conclusion: Tattoo artistes are either non-tech savvy or plain lazy. I honestly believe its the latter.

People are asking me why I'm not going back to my orginal artist that did my last couple of tattoos, as honestly speaking, both the artwork and the needlework are great. However, the attitude of the artiste isn't. I understand that artists have their weird vibes and characters, but at the end of the day, the canvas that you are painting on is still mine, no matter how signature your drawings are. This particular artiste in question, D, always wants to do thing HIS way, despite what you really want. I specifically told him I wanted my tattoo in black and grey, above my chest, but he insisted that it should be in color and on my chest instead of being above it. After some haggling, we reached a compromise but after the tattoo was done, it was done in exactly the same way that he 1st proposed. What an ass. Yes, I admit it does look nice but I would have thought he should have the decency to respect my decision as well, since it is going to be with me for the rest of my life. Stupid artistic farts...

Anyway, would greatly appreciate if someone can recommend me a tattoo studio that does great oriental style tattoos at reasonable prices. Meanwhile, I'll just have to keep looking I suppose...

Bird flu in hong kong?

2006-03-22T16:00:00.000+08:00

Apparently, it got to donald.... may he rest in peace...

Submissions by Dr Chee

2006-03-22T15:43:00.000+08:00

[Below]is from the desk of Dr. Chee. Please consider to carry it on your blog.

Cheers!
k.h.

Submissions
(Revised with additional references)
As the AG has preferred a charge against me, I believe I am entitled to a trial here I can call witnesses to demonstrate the truth of my tatements and to document with precision how the courts in ingapore have been used by the PAP Government to maintain its chokehold on the country.

I have said before I will not run away. I am here to face my accuser nd the very people whom I have criticised. I am here to speak the ruth, whatever the consequences may bring. if you are going to charge me for contempt of court, at least have the ecency to allow me the opportunity to defend myself. There is nothing honorable in a fight wherein you bind and incapacitate your opponent.

Defamation without trial

This hearing has it roots from the defamation suits that Mr Lee Kuan ew and Mr Goh Chok Tong took against me in 2001.

In my applications I had indicated to the courts that I needed the services of Queen’s Counsels (QC) as no Singaporeans would take up my case. I am not alone in this predicament. Mr Tang Liang Hong also had great difficult in finding local representation when he was fighting his own defamation suits with the PAP. Mr J B Jeyaretnam experienced a similar plight, saying "No lawyer in Singapore wants to do political cases. It's a very sad commentary. Lawyers here are too scared for their own livelihood.” Mr Charles Gray QC who had represented Mr Tang in 1997 said in his submission to the court of appeal that it was “no credit on the legal community that Tang had been unable to find any lawyer (apart from Mr Jeyaretnam himself and, briefly, Mr Peter Low) willing to represent him.”

It is a telling indictment of the legal and judicial systems in Singapore when Singaporean lawyers fear doing what they have been trained to do and sworn to uphold – justice and the rule of law. The judiciary must ask itself how and why Singaporean lawyers are afraid to take up such cases when foreigners are not.

I was told by the courts that my case wasn’t complex enough to warrant my engaging a QC. The funny thing was that my opponents had solicited the services of Mr Davinder Singh, Senior Counsel which I understand is the Singapore version of a Queen’s Counsel. Mr Singh, whom I am sure you are aware, is an experienced lawyer in defamation suits.

How much more onesided can the fight be? In one corner you have a Senior Counsel and the chief of one of the biggest law firms in Singapore of more than 150 lawyers, I believe, and in the other corner, a psychologist with zero training in law. But the referee didn’t seem to care and allowed the fight to proceed. How the courts could be assisted to come to a fair decision when one side did not have legal representation did not seem to be a matter of concern to the judiciary.

So my case hobbled along and came to its inevitable demise when Messrs Lee Kuan Yew and Goh Chok Tong applied for summary judgment where the case was heard in chambers before the registrar. Expectedly, the matter was awarded to the plaintiffs which meant that there would be no trial, no calling for witnesses and no crossexaminations.

In the meantime, I had gotten legal advice that the matter contained issues that necessitated a trial. But what could I do? So no lawyer and no trial. The courts then proceeded to award the plaintiffs $500,000. I have already paid $400,000 in costs and damages in another defamation lawsuit involving my dismissal from NUS and, as a result, I don’t have much left to pay Lee and Goh.

The question that I want to ask is: Why have the courts been so unfair to me? By not allowing me QCs and thereby legal representation, and then not giving me a trial, and subsequently ordering me to pay Lee Kuan Yew and Goh Chok Tong halfamillion dollars, both of whom are millionaires by the way, and then making me a bankrupt when I am unable to, is to not only punish me but also my wife and children. Is this how justice is meted out in Singapore? If you were me, would you also not have grave doubts about the entire system?

Trials gone bad

One need look no further than the suits of the PAP leaders against Mr Tang Liang Hong to understand how problemaic our judicial system is. The legal events that led to the bankruptcy of Mr Tang make for sordid reading.

I will cite a few instances:

During the 1997 elections Mr Tang had made a police report complaining about the accusations PAP leaders had made about him. The PAP leaders accused Mr Tang of making public the contents of the report to the news media and proceeded to sue Mr Tang and ultimately obtained more than $3 million in judgment. This subsequently made Mr Tang, who now lives in exile, a bankrupt.The horror of it all was that it was later revealed, during crossexamination by the late George Carman QC, who was representating Mr Jeyaretnam, that Home Affairs Minister Wong Kan Seng had ordered the police to give him a copy of the report, which by the way is confidential, passed it on to Mr Goh Chok Tong who was then the prime minister and who then gave it to Senior Minister Lee Kuan Yew who disseminated the report’s contents to the media.

Two questions begged to be asked:

Why was a confiential report made available to the PAP when it was confidential? Remember, the information was later used by the PAP leaders to sue Mr Tang in their private capacities. Why was Mr Tang found guilty of defamation when it was Mr Lee Kuan Yew who had released the information contained in the police report to the media? Does it make sense for Mr Lee to disseminate the information and then sue Mr Tang for defamation? More incredibly, Mr Jeyaretnam had held up an envelope during an election rally and informed the public that Tang had made a police report. For that he was also sued and convicted of defamation despite he fact that he neither revealed the contents of the police report nor entioned anything in detail about the PAP politicians. n the Tang Liang Hong case, it will be remembered that Mr Lee Kuan ew had made a statement in his affidavit that the town of Johor Baru was “notorious for shootings, muggings and carjackings.”

In the ensuing uproar on the Malaysian side, Lee was forced to retract his statement and apologize to Malaysia. Lee then applied to have his statement removed from his affidavit. But Tang queried the move on a point of law: that the rules of court stated that an affidavit or parts of it may be struck off only on the grounds that it was “scandalous, irrelevant, or oppressive.”

The judge allowed Lee’s application saying that the judiciary “should help Singapore maintain good bilateral relations.” Maintaining good bilateral relations is the work for the Executive Branch of the Government, in particular the Foreign Ministry. The judiciary’s role is to ensure that justice is meted out in accordance with court rules and the law to contesting parties. I will submit more on this point a little later.

To heap insult upon the already enormous injury, the judiciary then ordered Tang to pay cost for the application even though Mr Lee was the one who had made the statement about Johor Baru and it was Lee who had appliedto have the offending words removed! Similar occurrences happened in my own case. In 2004, I had informed the courts that I would be away in the United States to do a fellowship until September that year. In July while I was still away, Mr Lee Kuan Yew and Mr Goh Chok Tong applied for the hearing to assess damages to be brought forward. The Registrar then wrote to me, knowing that I was away, to attend court to ”confirm the new dates” proposed by the plaintiffs. I found out about this only when I returned to Singapore in September. The fact that the plaintiffs changed their minds about the application and decided to stick to the original dates was cold comfort to me. Going back to the Tang case, It will also be recalled that Mr Tang’s wife was named a codefendant to the suit even though she had nothing to do with case. Be that as it may, when Mrs Tang tried to visit Johor Baru one day, she was stopped by immigration officials who proceeded to impound her passport. Mr Lee Kuan Yew later said in court that “we were compelled to seize her passports for the purpose of satisfaction of judgments to be obtained by [the plaintiffs].” We? Since when was there a law to allow plaintiffs in defamation suits to seize the passports of defendants? Where was the judiciary to prevent such an abuse of power?

International criticisms

These events were not conjured by me for fun. They were actual occurrences. They are incontrovertible facts that demonstrated how the judiciary has bent over backwards to accommodate those in power at the expense of the political opposition in Singapore. These occurrences have led international observers to come to the conclusion that the judiciary is indeed influenced by the executive. Ross Worthington, in his paper Hermes and Themis: An Empirical Study of the Contemporary Judiciary in Singapore, listed the observers: (p. 492)

“Criticism of the Singaporean judiciary has been made by international human rights organizations such as Amnesty International and Asia Watch, by judicial institutions such as the Bar Association of the City of New York, the International Commission of Jurists in Canada, Australia, and its international office in Geneva, the Privy Council and eminent internationally renown senior counsel such as John PlattsMill QC, Frank Galbaley QC, Anthony Lester QC, Geoffery Robertson QC, Judge Paul Bentley, and Stuart Littlemore QC. These critisims have usually been basedon judgments in political cases in Singapore, not on the basis of political belief, but according to the established legal principles of common law nations, the same standards Singapore professes to follow.”

[Defamation lawsuits have] done little to overcome the courts’ reputation as improperly compliant to the interests of the country’s ruling People’s Action Party. – International Commission of Jurists “What emerges…is a government that has been willing to decimate the rule of law for the benefit of its political interests. Lawyers have been cowed to passivity, judges are kept on a short leash, and the law has been manipulated so that gaping holes exist in the system of restraints on government action toward the individual.” – New York City Bar Association Lawyer’s Rights Watch Canada: “The use of defamation suits in Singapore to prevent political statement belies any notion that Singapore is a democracy. Democracy is the right to participate inone’s governance and to receive, distribute and debate information regarding issues of public concern and the performance of public officials without the risk of civil or criminal penalties. Singapore has failed to protect these rights. Singapore has also failed to honour its obligation to promote and protect the rule of law (a state of affairs in which there are legal barriers to government arbitrariness and legal safeguard for the protection of individuals.)” Retired Canadian judge Paul Bentley: “The issue of' whether the filing of' defamation suits affects freedom of expression and peaceful democratic discourse in Singapore is beyond question for me. The more pressing concern is whether international condemnation of the practice and faint signs of growing domestic distaste for it, will be sufficient to change the government's tactics against its political opponents.”

Professor Ross Worthington had conducted an empirical study on the judiciary in Singapore and this is what he found: On the subjugation of the judicial branch of government (p. 491) “This is a system of governance which, however, has been extensively criticized for its lack of transparency, accountability, and democratic behaviour. In particular, there has been a continuing concern that the ruling Peoples Action Party (PAP) governments have produced a political system in which all branches of government, including the judicial, have been subjugated to the executive branch. This has led to considerable criticism of the Singaporean judiciary…”

On the control of the subordinate courts (p. 497)
“This practice of actively ensuring that there is no professional judiciary within the subordinate courts subjugates these courts directly to executive power; they are not part of an independent judiciary but an arm of executive government, part of the Singapore Legal Service, and they carry into that role the norms characteristic of the civil service including implicit support for the political executive and its power arrangements.”

On appointees to the Supreme Court (p. 499)
“Almost half of appointees to Supreme Court are drawn from the AttorneyGeneral’s Chambers or were formerly senior officers of this department before going into private practice and then into the judiciary. If we accept that it is irrelevant for senior civil servants to be PAP members or cadres as it is both illegal for them to be members of a political party and they can have allegiance to the party without such a formal status, those appointed with formal or informal affiliation to the PAP form 85 percent of Supreme Court appointees. Those not obviously linked to the PAP comprise 15 percent.”

On the abolition of appeal to the Privy Council (p. 502)
“The last vestige of complete independence in the judicial system, appeal to the Judicial Committee of the Privy Council, was abolished in February 1994, despite Lee Kuan Yew’s previous insistence that Singapore should ‘allow a review of the judicial process that take place here in some other tribunal where obviously under influence cannot be brought to bear’. The abolition of appeals to a nonSingaporean tribunal is, in itself, no cause for concern; New Zealand acted in 1996 to do likewise, as has Australia. The principle concern is that the indigenous judicial system be sufficiently mature to defend the rule of law, maintain the independence of the judiciary and, at the most basic level, be able to provide balance in the exercise of state power over citizens.

Given that the Privy Council and several international judicial organizations had castigated the Singaporean judiciary for failing to uphold such standards, it is difficult not to conclude that the executive replace the Privy Council with a domestic Court of Appeal as a means of maintaining executive control of the judiciary and minimizing international criticism of the judicialexecutive nexus and the executive’s occasional overt abuses of power.” In the US State Dept Human Rights Report 2005, it is stated that “The following human rights problems were reported” one of which was “executive influence over the judiciary.”

The report went on to say that “Some judicial officials, especially supreme court judges, have ties to the ruling party and its leaders… Government leaders historically have used court proceedings, in particular defamation suits, against political opponents and critics. Both this practice and consistent awards in favor of government plaintiffs raised questions about the relationship between the government and the judiciary...”

All the instances that I have cited, there seems to be almost universal agreement about the lack of judicial independence in Singapore. Given this isn’t there a possibility that there may be, just may be, a kernel of truth in all their observations.

You may say that all these organizations and individuals are somehow stupider than the judicial and legal officials in Singapore when it comes to interpretation of the law. Or may be they are all angmohs (Caucasians) who are intensely jealous of Singapore’s success and want to sabotage it. They are all either telling lies or deeply mistaken, the whole lot of them: AI, ICJ, Professor Ross Worthington, the US State Dept and so on.

Maybe you can try to make this to be the case that everyone else is wrong except you. But what is most important is what does the average reasonable person think.

But let us for the moment assume that everyone else is wrong and that the AG and the Courts are right. You will recall that in the Christopher Lingle case, the AG admitted, and the courts agreed, that when the American academic said that some Asian governments used “compliant” judiciaries to bankrupt opposition politicians, he was referring to Singapore.

Let’s pause for a moment here and take a closer look at the absurdity of the present case. The AG and the courts acknowledge that“compliant” judiciaries are used to bankrupt opposition politicians in Singapore. That’s what you said. Yet when I agree with you and say the same, I am charged for contempt of court. Does this make any sense to you?

The only way that I can be convicted for contempt of court is if you admit that the AG and the Courts had lied in the Christopher Lingle case because it is not true that the Singapore judiciary is “compliant” when it came to defamations suits involving opposition politicians. But if you are speaking the truth, then so am I. And if I am speaking the truth, how can I be in contempt of court. Isn’t truth what courts seek? On this point allow me to point out that in Nationwide vs Mills
(p 39):
“It is not neccesary, even if it be possible, to chart the limits of contempt scandalizing the court. It is sufficient to say that the revelation of truth—at all events when its revelation is for the public benefit—and the making of a fair critisim based on fact do not amount to a contempt of court though the truth revealed or the critisim made is such as to deprive the court or judge of public confidence. The critical difference between the scope of s. 299(1)(d)(ii) and the scope of contempt of court is that the latter does not purport to supress justifiable or fair and reasonable critisim which exposes grounds for loss of official repute, but s. 299(1)(d)(ii) purports to supress all critisim which is likely to bring the Commission into disrepute including critisim that is justifiable, fair and reasonable.”

Conclusion
The truth of the matter is that convicting and punishing me for contempt does not and cannot change reality, it cannot elevate the reputation of the Singapore courts. Its like the big bully punching out the little guy for calling him a bully. Please don’t for one minute think that I am attacking you, sir. I respect you as a person and I hold have only the highest regard for your intellect.

But I cannot in good conscience continue to allow it to go unremarked when our judicial system is in such a dismal state. I am not foolish. I know the power that you wield. It is power backedby handcuffs, prison cells and, utimately, guns, the combination of which keep heads bowed and mouths shut. I don’t possess or have at my disposal such enormous power. I have only my freedom with which to wage this battle. But I also have something that is far more powerful than all the physical force that you can muster – and that is, the truth. And if you realise the power that truth posseses you will see how lopsided this contest is, and you will have the wisdom, I pray, to get on the right side. What you do to me today, the sentence that you will hand down, will be temporary. But the infamy that you will have to live with will go down in the annals of Singapore’s history and that will last forever. I plead not for leniency but for reform, that good and wise minds prevail in this room today.

Speaking truth to undemocratic power is never easy for it invariably invites reprisal. I do not want to go to prison for I have have a lovely wife and three beautiful children wanting me to come home. Having to leave them under such circumstances is the most painful thing I have had to do. But living with the shame of keeping my head bowed when injustice permeates our society is infinitely worse. I want to be free but freedom is nothing when one cannot speak the truth to power.

so bad that it feels good.

2006-03-20T17:53:00.000+08:00

Its soooooooo sinful..... :D

random rants - guys, woman, sex

2006-03-18T02:03:00.000+08:00

A female friend was lamenting to me the other day about how guys only have sex on their mind. Not true, i told her. There always also football and cars. :)

But honestly, I remember reading a study somewhere, sometime, that guys think about sex and average of once maybe every 60 seconds or so. I think that's a generous estimate. Most guys I know are much more hornier than that. Me included.

I get fustrated when I get no sex sometimes. Its worse when you are attached, and is like having a cold war with your girlfriend. You want it, but you know you are not going to get it from her, yet you know its morally incorrect to cheat on her, and the worse thing is you hate masturbating. That basically sums up the situation I'm in right now, which, if you think about it, is really sad... :(

People often equate having a partner to having regular bionking sessions. That is the biggest misconception of the century, at least for me. I used to club alot. By alot, I mean a minimum of 3 times a week, wed, fri and sat are confirm dates, while I'll squeeze in another couple more days if schedule permits. I'm not trying to brag here, but 90% of the time, I do not go home alone. I'm not exactly into ONS, in fact, most relations I had lasts way more than a night, its like I have a number of what others usually called 'fuck buddy'. They are really my friends, and we go way back, without any sexual beginnings. Alcohol is usually the culprit, and I guess deep down, no one really wants to be lonely....

Anyway, the point is, after I got to know my girl, I stopped fucking any one of them anymore. In fact, I don't even club much anymore. Its not easy resisting temptations, I can atest to that... I run a pub and you get hit on pretty much somedays by both your customers and sometimes your own staff. I have guys coming up to me and telling me how much they envy me, but honestly, it feels even worse when the food is at your mouth, but you are resisting from taking it. Sometimes I wonder is they are just being a tease as they know I remain pretty much faithful to my gal.To my gal, she probably doesn't see all these stuff that I'm actually 'not doing', rather, I'm judged by what I actually do, which honestly, is not alot. I'm not a romantic by any means, so you won't be getting any flowers or praises regularly. I'm not that rich so it means theres no expensive gifts every other day. What I do is I stand by you faithfully, always there for you when you need me. But this kind of things are intangible. You can't see it, so you don't weigh it. You only see what I do not do...

Anyway, that was a major digression. -_______-"

As I was saying, there's no doubt guys are horny all the time. We want sex, its the way nature made us. But then again, why did nature play such a cruel joke and made guys perpetually horny while making woman seemingly able to go without sex? I remember there was this movie about this guy trying to abstain from sex for a month or something for lent, and you can see and laugh at him as he goes cold turkey. Yes, it is a gross exaggeration, but you would believe it(mildly). What if the lead was a woman? you would think its ridiculous wouldn't you?

Anyway, I'm starting to blabble and not making sense... Should just go to bed... with no sex again today... sigh...

Brokeback Top Gun

2006-03-16T15:08:00.000+08:00

This is funny :)

Top Gun Recut

Brokeback Top Gun

Which Celebrity Do You Look Like?

2006-03-16T02:02:00.000+08:00

haha, was about to go to sleep when I came across this funny shit courtesy of lmd

Decide to give it a try and the results are freaking funny :)

I look the most like

1) Francoise Hardy (61%)

Knn! I look like a girl?? But she quite chio lah.. so ok.. although dunno who she is.. haha!

2)Kim Cattrall (60%)

Nabei! Another woman?? I am seriously being to think that there is something wrong with the system... I mean, I look so manly one leh! :)

3)Jay Chou (59%)

Finally! The system is starting to work. :)

4)Ashton Kutcher (56%)

Ok, so the system isn't exactly faulty after all I guess :)

Decide to give it another try with a picture of my gal and me, and the top 3 are:

For my gal

1)Alizee (74%)

If only.... hehe :P

2)Jennifer Jason Leigh (73%)

I was thinking the system probably have no problems identifying her as a woman as she got long hair. I was proven wrong

3)Will Ferrell (72%)

THAT SMILE!!! Its freakingly uncanny ok! gosh....

My results:

1)Rod Stewart (67%)

Hope I don't have THAT many wrinkles on MY face...

2)David Coulthard (61%)

My face got so square meh..?

3)Bunko Kanazawa (60%)

The complimentary woman picture again... chio ok, I see I also like.. :P Looks like a porn star though.... Gives a whole new meaning to the expression 'Go fuck yourself' :D

Go try it out yourself!

who do you blog for?

2006-03-14T01:21:00.000+08:00

Just looking at the counter for the blog. Realised that there are like 100+ views there. Then I kinda wonder why I put the counter up in the first place. Do I really care how many people is reading this?

I have two blogs, one here, and one at xanga. I post most of my personal stuff there, stuff that is so boring that you would not be interested anyway. I like that blog alot. I had it for like two years and known a whole group of virtual friends who feels like I know them and they know me, but we have never ever met. I dun feel comfortable meeting up with new people, I never like to socialise. Which is apparently abit weird considering that I'm a Gemini and I can be really whacky and fun(especially when I'm drunk :P) but I just dun like to get to know new people(again, unless when I'm drunk).

So I had a comfortable existence there at xanga, writing just about everything, and having my virtual friends commenting on them, knowing my deepest secrets, yet I know that they won't ever tell cos they dun even know what I look like, let alone who I am. That is, until I made the mistake of letting my (now)girlfriend knew about the blog. Suddenly, I feel that I cannot blog freely cos I will be judged. She was the one and only person that I know in real life that knew I kept a blog. I suddenly feel I have to present myself in a better light. We were not together yet back then, but I had an interest in her, and I can't exactly blog about the flirting session that I had the previous night with whoever it happen to be when I drunk. Now that we are together, I can't exactly blog about arguments and the fact that I think she is being a riduculous spoilt bitch.(not if I wanted the arguments to stop) Suddenly, I feel crippled.

Those entries went into private posts. But the thing about private posts meant that only I could read it. No longer can my virtual friends comment on them and tell me that I'm a jerk/bastard/poor sod. I lost the feeling of actually blogging something off my chest, cos only until I know that someone knows how I feel or what I'm talking about would I feel justified. Its like I'm not 'suffering' in silence, someone knows. Pathetic huh?

Its a love hate thing. I look at my counter going up, and I'm glad in that I feel I'm being heard, yet at the same time, I dun really want people to know, or understand what I am actually feeling. I will then move away from personal thoughts and posts. How contridicting. Who should we blog for??

Jobs I would like to do (Singapore only)

2006-03-02T20:45:00.000+08:00

Taking a break off my final projects, I being to think of jobs that I would like to do (read: easy job, high pay) when I graduate.

1. MP (NOT Military Police!)
Job Scope:
- Show face once every 5 years to shake hands and carry babies.
- Take home pay average of the highest professionals.
- Lamblast opposition at every opportunity.
- When asked uncomfortable questions, wave hand dismissively and declare that we need to 'move on'
- Or sue them

If you are lucky, you can probably stay in your job without going through a single election(ie never got tested!).

Dream job rating : *****

2. Charity Organistation CEO
Job Scope:
- Get donations
- Get more donations
- Get even more donations
- Use donations to buy gold tap
- Use donations to pay for worthless projects run by friends or self.
- Get paid a peanut a year

Nobody will ever need to know how much money you are ~~stealing~~ getting paid. Just dun go for gold taps, and leave more powerful organisations alone...

Dream job rating : ****

3. Pastor
- Pray
- Help people keep money
- Pray
- Help church keep money
- Pray
- Help 'invest' the money

Too much praying involved... :(

Dream job rating : *

4. President
- Eat lunch with visitng delegates
- Visit other countries to have lunch
- Guard reserves (But never attempt to ask how much you are guarding aka the late mr ong)

Cons - Diff to get employed...

I had a few more ideas in my mind earlier... will update again.

Dun believe everything you read online

2006-03-01T22:02:00.000+08:00

Turns out that its all a very nicely done practical joke.
link

Semen from masturbation causes blockages at Durham University

2006-02-25T02:07:00.000+08:00

I can't believe half of the shit I come across everyday anymore...
Read the full story here

Gone for good? Good riddance!

2006-02-24T20:38:00.000+08:00

She's shutting down her blog she says. Is it just me or does anyone really believe that he/she'll be gone for good?

I read xiaxue's blog every now and then. Less nowadays. For an alternative view, I tend to check out xialanxue too whenever I do visit xx, just for the fun of it. My impression of both are,

for xx, she is crude, disillusioned, and in your face, but at least she is funny, honest, and provides entertaining posts every so often.

for xlx, I honestly find that she is not so much of a writer, but someone who I can best described as an attention seeker. Reading her posts sometimes, especially those that are non-xx related, are suprisingly bland, and I would hardly think she could reach the level of 'popularity' if it had not been the fact that there are so many people who couldn't stand xx. People just wish to find an agreeing voice, no matter whether what they say make sense or not.

I'm seriously put off by xlx recent antics regarding the nyp tammy incident. She was once again riding on others to raise her own popularity, and when the tide turned, tried to be every the nice guy, portraying herself as some righteous crusader, going around forums and invading other people's blog, telling people what to do... what a fakeo.

However, I seriously find it hard to believe that xlx will be gone for good. She is too much of a publicity whore. Her claim that she might turn to blogging in another name, I'm willing to bet that no one would even bother to read her mediocore posts. She will then turn back to doing what she does best in order to get the attention she craves... riding on others popularity... trust me...

Tammy Video

2006-02-23T13:58:00.000+08:00

I must say readers are pretty efficient. And apparently, it is not just a single clip that I initially thought it was, as I received 2 seperate clips, and there are rumours of more.

~~Before passing judgement like a movie critic, I would like to state that the views are mine alone.~~

Fuck that. I shall just watch and not comment. Think that would be a wiser thing to do.

NYP Scandal

2006-02-21T14:45:00.000+08:00

As most of you should know by now, the hottest scandal over the past couple of weeks is about this gal from NYP that had her handphone stolen, and a sex video of her and her bf was circulated on the net.

Much as I pity the poor gal, I'm not going to debate the moral issue involved like so many had, nor her intelligence(or apparent lack of it) in allowing her bf to film it, AND keep it in her hp that can so easily misplaced or simply viewed by curious frens who like to check out other people's phone functions(I know alot of ppl are like tat). Personally, I think what she did is pretty common in this digital age nowadays, i'm sure many of you have your own form of porno on your handphones, regardless on whether you're starring in it or not. :)

The thing that irks me here is how some people first played the devil by gleefully spreading the news, then in a matter of days or even hours, turned to play the angel by proclaiming what a poor thing she is, people should stop spreading her video clip, and even proclaiming wanting to help her find out who is the culprit that spread the video in the 1st place. Bloody hypocrites.

The other type of people, most commonly seen in forums, starts initially whining in threads, asking people what they are talking about, and literally begging for people to share the clip with them. Somehow, along the way someone must have cos after a few days, they too turned angel and start proclaiming what a poor gal she is and people should stop distributing the clip. After they had finished watching it. Bloody hypocrites x2

I personally have not seen the footage yet, and I won't pretend that I'm not interested. I'm a guy after all, not some bloody hypocrites. Is there really any guy out there that is not interested in porn? As the saying go, 有不吃鱼的猫吗?

p.s. So... anyone can send to me? :P

Google's new payment system

2006-02-17T00:03:00.000+08:00

I almost choked on my drink when I saw this piece of news.

Google's proposing a new payment system, which will be called...

....

GBUY!!!

OMG!! I guess the ang mos won't see the funny side of things, but I can imagine a couple of ah bengs having the following conversation.

ah beng 1 : hey, tank chew for buying my item hor. Now u transfer the mooney from your gbuy to my gbuy account ok?

ah beng 2 : wau lau eh, i buy things from you u still scold me what cheebye cheebye eh!

ah beng 1 : no lah, gbuy is use for paying the money one..!

ah beng 2 : nabei, u want lim peh to use cheebye to pay money, u think i prositute isit?

-.-''''

forgive me, its been a long day..... :)

Deadlines

2006-02-16T19:46:00.000+08:00

I love deadlines. Yes, I'm a freak, I already know that. :)

Deadlines make me work. I'm the world's number one procrastinator who follows the procrastinator creed religiously.

-----------------------------------
Procrastinator's Creed

* 1. I believe that if anything is worth doing, it would have been done already.
* 2. I shall never move quickly, except to avoid more work or find excuses.
* 3. I will never rush into a job without a lifetime of consideration.
* 4. I shall meet all of my deadlines directly in proportion to the amount of bodily injury I could expect to receive from missing them.
* 5. I firmly believe that tomorrow holds the possibility for new technologies, astounding discoveries, and a reprieve from my obligations.
* 6. I truly believe that all deadlines are unreasonable regardless of the amount of time given.
* 7. I shall never forget that the probability of a miracle, though infinitesmally small, is not exactly zero.
* 8. If at first I don't succeed, there is always next year.
* 9. I shall always decide not to decide, unless of course I decide to change my mind.
* 10. I shall always begin, start, initiate, take the first step, and/or write the first word, when I get around to it.
* 11. I obey the law of inverse excuses which demands that the greater the task to be done, the more insignificant the work that must be done prior to beginning the greater task.
* 12. I know that the work cycle is not plan/start/finish, but is wait/plan/plan.
* 13. I will never put off until tomorrow, what I can forget about forever.
* 14. I will become a member of the ancient Order of Two-Headed Turtles (the Procrastinator's Society) if they ever get it organized.
-----------------------------------

Without deadlines, I'll never get anything done. The surprising thing is though, that more often then not, I'll meet the deadlines. Imagaine this. A project with a duration of 6 mths is supposed to be due soon. Just started work on it, and I'm confident in completing it in another week or so. Imagine how stupid everyone(me included) will look if I had started this thing early, and submitted it 5 mths ahead of schedule. I'm just trying to save everyone from the embarrassment.

Stuart 'Physco' Pearce

2006-01-20T14:47:00.000+08:00

I love this man. Great player with a wonderful left foot, great role model for his honesty, determination and never give up attitude, and now on his way to becoming a great(hopefully) manager. I can't think of anyone else in football quite like him anymore. Really enjoyed watching him play back at N.Forest, even his stint at Newcastle in the twilight of his career didn't stop him from giving 110% every single game. I could never forget the game at west ham where he was determined to get back on the field even though he could barely stand. It was later discovered that he actually had a broken foot! Truely physco, truely a great man. I salute you Pearce!

"I find the whole England situation quite embarrassing. I was in management for a couple of months when the first England stuff started. Then when we got one point out of four games over Christmas, no-one mentioned it. Suddenly, I win the derby and people are talking about England again. It is absolutely ludicrous and a massive slur on people who have been in club management for years. It is absolutely pathetic. I would not rule myself out of any job. But it is my belief someone should have international experience and many years in club management before they are considered for a job like England."

Arsenal 7 Boro 0

2006-01-15T01:01:00.000+08:00

Thiery Henry... Footballing GOD

Stone the devil

2006-01-13T07:40:00.000+08:00

Was reading the news that some 50 person died in a stampade in Saudi Arabia during the annual haj ritual of throwing stones at the devil. Seems to me that the devil is getting the last laugh.

Me? Bastard?

2006-01-12T03:10:00.000+08:00

Was reading lmd and a couple of posts make me really think back on my past.

Ya, I'm one of those bastards that she mentioned. I'm not proud of it, but I never hide that fact. I seriously believed I was going to hell at the point of time, if you consider some of the things I did. Luckily, I'm not a religious person so it did not really bother me. I'm not sure why but woman usually find me 'non-threatening', just another 'nice guy' when all I was looking for is yet another night of sex.

I'm not sure what got into me in those couple of years. Maybe its due to the loss of her, or maybe its due to the loss of faith in love, I dunno and I have no wish to find excuses for my actions. I've hurt alot of people along the way, many of whom displayed their dismay when they really found out what I was like, despite the intial good vibes that they have from me. I played that to my advantage, like a cat playing with its food...

I guess in a way, playing this game, and winning, makes me feel like I'm worth something. To be able to seduce or rather sell yourself to a total stranger is so exciting, tantalising, such an ego boost.... guess that was what all that was about....

I no longer have that urge. Not since I meet her. :) But then again, sometimes I wonder, will I ever go down that route again? When one day, I do not feel loved or wanted anymore, and I'll need to do something to justify my self-worth. To a guy, that means to fuck around. Pathetic but true.

Boring new year

2006-01-08T17:52:00.000+08:00

Its another year, and its the same old routine you're seeing everywhere again. People looking back/reflecting on the year just passed, setting new resolutions and predictions for the new year. BOOOORIIINGGG.......

Maybe its just me, cos none of these things ever work for me.

I hate looking back. I know that there is this saying that 'those who do not understand the mistakes of history are likely to commit them again'(or something like that lah)but then again, I'm really someone that never learns, or what my mother always refers to as 讲不听or 'gong bu tia' since young. I dun really see how reflecting will do me much good as I'll get very fustrated that although I didn't do something properly, yet there's nothing I can do to change it. So I prefer not to look back at all.

As much as I hate to look back, I hate to plan forward too. I like to do things spontaneously, spur of the moment. It gives me much more statisfaction when I managed to get it done, as well as the adrenaline rush in going into something knowing nothing. Besides, if I'm so good at predicting whats going to happen next, I might as well just aim to stike toto or 4d every other week or so, and retire happily ever after. We all wish we could do that sometimes don't we?

What New Year RE-Solution?

2006-01-02T14:15:00.000+08:00

Why do people like to make promises/targets for the new year, forget it for the next 10 mths, and try to rush to meet the targets in the remaining mth of the year, and finally, bringing it forward for another year with a little changes here and there. -_-" thats the idea of resolution, to RE(package) your soultion for the other year, its basically crap. Why to we have to make resolutions only on Jan 1? so if the resoultion is to lose 5kg off that fat ass, why can't we make the resolution to do so before xmas where we tend to binge a whole lot of junk over the festive period?(or is that the whole point anyway? eat more 1st then diet? hahaha!)

What would you do if the world is coming to an end in the next hour?

2006-01-01T19:06:00.000+08:00

Suddenly thought of this funny joke that I came across quite some time ago. This man was asking his friend the above question,

"What would you do if the world is coming to an end in the next hour?"

his friend replied, "well, i supposed i'll screw the closest woman i can find no matter young, old, fat or skinny. hell, i'll basically screw anything that moves!"

"what about you?" his friend counter-asked him

after a long while, the man replied, "I'll stay perfectly still, and not move a muscle...." :D

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Whats your childhood ambition?

2005-12-30T11:56:00.000+08:00

I suddenly thought of this question, and I realised that up to now, 26 yrs on, i still do not have a clue as in what i really want to be.

I remembered back in primary school, we always had to write or talk about what you wanna be when you grow up. My friends would be listing their ambitions, from doctors/nurses because they wanna help people, to soldiers etc because they wanna protect the country yadda yadda. I'll just be listening as they go down the line and probably just steal someone's idea when it is my turn to answer.(yes, i was that devious already as a kid)

Since young, I had always known the vaule of money as the family wasnt very well off back then. So there were never any idealistic ambitions to save the world or volunteer services for free. I was a pragamatic kid. Still am. Money is still most realistically the number one factor that will affect my career decision. No job is too lowly to do, as long as the pay makes up for it. Look at some of the part time jobs I've held since the age of 14.

- KFC (1st real job)
- Waiter
- Road Sweeper/Cleaner
- MLM
- Factory worker
- Packers
- Movers
- Warehouse assistant
- Retailer
- Door-to-door sales
- Bartender
- Cashier
- Network assistant
- Solutions provider
- Web Designer
- PR manager
- Pub owner(current)

That looks quite a list doesnt it? To tell the truth, none of them really interests me, its all about the money. So whats my next move? Graduation's in another 6 mths, I wanna try something else that I've not done before. Any ideas?